Daisies in July

Janet Fremont

Asters in September Frost before the snows fly Violets in the springtime Daisies in July

I remember the valley from when I was a very little girl. I don't think it's really changed much from then even though it's been, what, almost thirty years. God, it couldn't have really been that long, now could it? Of course I wouldn't expect it to change very much. Most things in this part of the world tend to change slowly if at all. This valley is nearly a half mile from my house, up the mountain a ways. I know people from Wyoming wouldn't call them mountains but here in West Virginia we do. There is a stream flowing from even higher up with the valley floor on either side spreading out in a meadow some sixty yards wide before the woods starts again and the land once more begins to slope upwards. Here land doesn't stay flat for very far anywhere. We own some two hundred forty-five acres of which most is still pretty wild. It's been in the family for generations. We do have some thirty acres which my parents had planted in corn or orchard. The orchard is still there but the corn fields have gone back to cedars, locusts and elderberry.

I guess it really has been over a quarter century but when I see my own Amber running through the open field or climbing the trees I still see myself. She even looks like I did. The same long, corn silk blonde hair. The same bright blue eyes. The same long legs and Tomboy tendencies. But I also see her father in her taller stance and the shape of her nose. And I see both of us in her determination, whether in making it to the top of a tree or in trying to find where the butterflies live. I smile to myself as I think that I never really discovered their home either.

Right now it's early afternoon and I'm just watching her play. She has never had a problem playing by herself. Out here we are a couple of miles from almost anyone else her age. She does have friends from school and we will bring them over or take her to their houses to play. She has no problem playing with others. It's just that it doesn't bother her if there's no one else around. She's just very independent. Come to think of it, I was a lot like that myself. When I was her age there were even fewer people in the area and until I started school at six - we had no kindergarten then - my cousin was generally the only other child I ever played with.

My cousin, Don, and his wife and their two kids live only three miles away by the roads - or a little over a mile through the woods - and Amber frequently plays with them. In fact in another half hour I'll take her back to the house and get her ready to go over there. She's spending the next two nights with them and Dan and I will have the place to ourselves. This afternoon he needed to finish a complicated program and I took Amber out here away from the house so he could get more work done. He's a programmer. This has the advantage that we can live out here and he can still make a good living but working at home has the disadvantage that a six year old who wants to play with her daddy can be very distracting. Actually I'm a programmer too, and have the same problem when she wants to play with her mother. Most of the time she is quite happy to play alone, but there are times ... Still if needed, we can generally schedule things so that one or the other of us can keep her happy and out of the way while the other works. One of the advantages of being independent programmers is that we can set our own schedules. But as most mothers know, it's still nice to have some time just for my husband and myself. Hence the visit to my cousin. We do the same for them and bring their Sue and John over here to play with Amber and let their parents have some alone time. It all seems to work out pretty well.

I lie back in the warm July sun and listen to the soft sound of the insects and a few birdcalls mixed with the sounds of the splashing water in the stream and of Amber talking to herself. Or maybe to the birds or the trees or the flowers. I know I used to. I know that if I listen long enough I will probably hear a passing jet high up somewhere but that would most likely be the only non-natural sound that would ever make its way into this valley. The smell of the clover surrounds me and I can see the million or so daisies sticking up everywhere. Now the sky is nearly clear with a few high, white clouds floating along on a soft breeze. Later I know there will be a nearly full moon. I close my eyes and think back to when I first discovered this valley.

I was born here. Well, not right here but in the hospital some twenty-five miles away. My parents owned the farm, or more properly, the place. Two hundred forty-five acres of hills and small fields. Not really a farm although they did raise some corn to be sold as feed. They also raised some chickens and sometimes a few pigs but the main thing grown was fruit. The orchard had apples mainly, but also a few plum, pear, and peach trees. Although this was not an expensive place to live, I doubt the things we grew would have supported us. My father also worked part time as a mechanic, repairing some of the heavy machinery the nearby mining company used. He had learned this trade in the army and was quite good at that so there was always something for him to do. Still, I doubt there would have been enough for the company to hire him full time but I knew he never wanted that kind of regular work anyway. He loved the orchard and the small amount of farming he did and could never have been happy as a "wage slave".

Of course I learned most of this when I grew older. I remember fragments of things from when I was very young, but I think the earliest really clear memory I have was one September when he took me up to the valley. My birthday is in early November and I would be turning five. As I have said, I was still at home because there was no kindergarten then. One day after lunch he said, "Let's go for a walk." I loved doing things with my dad and excitedly agreed. Mostly we did things close to the house but today he led me out through the woods and up the hill behind the house. I remember seeing him and mom smile at each other and I think they had agreed that she would stay in the house so the two of us could have some time alone.

Anyway, I remember walking for a long time. It was cool enough that I had on my little light jacket but the sun was shining and the sky nice and clear. After what seemed a very long trip to me we stepped out of the woods into the edge of the open valley. I remember stopping and staring, my mouth wide open. Everywhere there were purple flowers. Asters, as I later learned. There was also the deep, deep purple of some ironweed and the bright yellow of goldenrod, but mostly I remember the huge sea of purple asters. I had never seen anything so lovely.

I don't remember all that we did. I just remember picking a big handful of the lovely purple blooms to take back to mom and I do remember hanging on to them all the way back and being so proud when I handed them to her and she put them in a vase to sit on the mantel above the fireplace.

That was my first trip - at least the first I remember - up to the valley. At that age I didn't go back again for a while. I believe it was in late November - yes, it was just after Thanksgiving - when my dad again suggested we go for a walk the next day. They woke me up early, before the sun was up, and mom dressed me warmly. The weather had turned quite cool and most mornings there was at least a little frost outside until the sun had been up for some time. We had had a few light snows, but nothing to really cover the ground. When we left, mom came with us and when we stepped outside, the sun was just below the horizon.

This time the walk seemed a little shorter and we reached the entrance to the valley just after the sun cleared the eastern mountains. When we first left the trees I was greatly disappointed. I had been expecting the lovely purple flowers and instead all I saw was brown grass and dead weeds. I almost cried, "Where are the pretty flowers, Daddy?"

I think he and mom laughed a little but then he explained, "The purple flowers will be back next year but there are other flowers here now."

I looked all around and didn't see anything except brown and frost. "Where? I don't see any."

He smiled down at me and said, "Come over here." He led me a little way into the field and pointed at a brown goldenrod stem. His finger moved downwards to point to the ground where the stem emerged. "Look down there."

I moved closer and my eyes flew open as I exclaimed, "A white flower. Made of ice."

Mom said, "That's right. A frost flower."

"It's beautiful!" I examined it from all around and then I started looking elsewhere. I found others. Each one a little different but each looking unbelievably delicate. Each appeared to be made of spun spider web but a spider web of glistening crystal.

I must have spent an hour going from one lovely frost flower to another. I think at one point I asked if I could pick some and take them back. My parents smiled but explained that they would melt. "Frost flowers only live outside and only until the sun warms them. Just like the asters don't last forever, neither do the frost flowers. They just don't last as long as asters."

"Will they come back next year, too?"

"Yes, they always come back."

The next week snow came and the trail to the valley got a little hard for someone my size, so it wasn't until March that we went back again. The day was warm enough that I didn't need a jacket when I was walking but we packed a picnic lunch for the three of us and mom insisted I take my jacket for when we stopped moving to eat.

Again as we emerged from the woods I froze and just stared. The snow had gone some time before and now the grass was turning green. But it wasn't the green that stopped me. The entire floor of the valley was again carpeted with flowers! Purple ones and white ones and some that had both colors. "Violets," mom said.

I spent a long time going all around looking for perfect ones. After we had eaten our lunch I insisted on picking a big bunch to take back. Instead of just letting me carry them, Mom wrapped them in some of the plastic from our lunch and put them in with the other picnic stuff so they wouldn't get crushed. When we got back she found there were enough for three vases. One of them went into my bedroom and for days I looked at them when I woke and again when I was going to sleep.

But my greatest surprise was still to come. It was the middle of the summer. The week before we had driven over to a town thirty miles away to watch the Fourth of July fireworks and I was thrilled by the wonderful display of burning colored flowers as they exploded in the sky. This weekend we again packed a picnic lunch and mom and dad and I headed back to the valley.

No purple carpet this time. No fragile blooms of spun crystal. No, instead the entire valley floor was a blaze of white and red clover blooms, but above these stood rank upon rank of lovely daisies. Yellow centers and white petals. Millions and millions of them, some almost as tall as I was. Most of what I remember from that afternoon was running through the wonderland of blossoms and just reclining in the thick clover, drinking in its sweet scent, and looking up at the million stems with their yellow centers and white petals.

There was one other thing I remember. This was the first time my dad said it to me but it would certainly not be the last. Probably hundreds of times as I grew older. As we were leaving the open valley, just before we started back into the woods, I stopped and looked back. "Will they be here next time?" I asked.

"Maybe. Depends when we come. But if not they will be back next year." Then he quoted,

"Asters in September Frost before the snows fly Violets in the springtime Daisies in July"

I never knew if it was something he had read or if he made it up, but either way I will always remember it associated with him.

As I got older and started school, my circle of friends expanded. That didn't make any of them closer so most of the time I still played by myself, but maybe every month or so either I would go spend a night with one of my friends or one or more of them would come spend a day or two with me. Still, it never bothered me to be by myself. I had a good imagination and could always find something of interest to do. It might be just reading a good book or drawing or building something in my father's workshop. Or it might be going to the woods and dreaming up an imaginary setting and story. I also never lost my interest in the valley. By the time I was eight or nine I was allowed to go there by myself and that frequently became my destination. There I could read or draw or daydream imaginary adventures. Or just lie back and absorb the lovely sights and sounds and smells.

Maybe it was because of my dad's abilities in the mechanical area or maybe something I read or saw or maybe just my genes, but whatever the reason I developed an interest and some fair ability in science and technical areas. This made me a little unique as very few of the other kids - either girls or boys - around here had any similar interest. Oh, some of the boys especially worked on cars or other machinery, but they had no real interest in understanding the technical principles behind them. By the time I started seventh grade many at school had come to think of me as a nerd. (I'm sure most of them had never met a real nerd and didn't realize I couldn't begin to compare.)

I should say that while we were still quite isolated in this part of the country, we were not totally separated from the rest of the world. Unlike when my parents were young, we did have satellite TV, a computer system and the internet, although that wasn't anything like it is now. Although I did occasionally play video games at some of my friends' houses, I never got into the video game stuff so not having one didn't bother me at all. If anything the computer games that did interest me were the strategy types rather than the "chase and shoot-em-up" ones.

I guess by the time I entered junior high I realized I was a fair amount brighter than most of the other kids. I certainly wasn't a genius or anything but in school I did catch on a bit faster and I had a real interest in learning about most things. About that time I took an interest in learning to program computers - not just running other peoples' programs, but writing my own. From books and on my own I learned to be pretty good in a couple of different languages. Although I wasn't really interested in designing the hardware or anything, I did learn a lot about how computers actually worked. Understanding what the hardware really does helps a lot in making a program do what you want it to.

While my interest in computers did make me a little different from many of the other girls in some ways, I certainly had a lot in common with them, too. In particular, boys. At that age we were definitely beginning to notice the opposite sex.

By eighth grade most of us had started to become involved in mixed activities: parties, games and so on. I'm also sure a few girls were involved in some intense one-on-one activities. By that I mean that they were sexually active. Still, I think those girls were in the minority. In general the majority of our activities were group but most of us were also beginning to date as single couples. Not frequently, but by the time I turned fourteen in November I had been out with three different boys, although only one time each with two of them. The third, Ron, had taken me out four times, but our romantic activities had been limited to a little hand holding and once in a movie, his arm around my shoulder.

In mid December I mentioned that the next weekend my parents and I would be going out to cut our Christmas tree. Ron lived in the small town where our school was located and he said that they would probably be buying a tree from someplace in town. That night I asked my parents to be sure it was OK and the next day invited Ron to come over and find a tree on our place. After all, it wouldn't cost us anything and would save Ron's family the cost of a tree. Of course, that wasn't my real motive for asking. Anyway, his parents agreed and said they would bring him over on Saturday afternoon.

Saturday morning my family went out and found our own tree. I had kind of hinted that I would take Ron out to find his. I saw my mom and dad smile at each other and dad give her a wink before he said, "Are you sure you won't get lost or anything?"

I knew he was teasing but couldn't help but answer, "Dad, you know I know this place perfectly well! I couldn't get lost here."

He smiled and said, "Unless you wanted to."

I felt my face go red but he and mom pretended not to notice as he added, "Sure. Ron's parents can stay here where it's warm and talk with us while you two go out and get frozen." Mom and dad had met Ron's parents before, so it wasn't like the first time or anything.

When Ron's family arrived, my Mom suggested that they come in and have some cake and coffee while we went and found a tree. Ron's dad glanced at us and then turned to my dad. I couldn't see his face but I thought I saw a smile at the corner of his mouth as he said, "Thanks. That sounds a lot better than getting cold and wet." The four adults went inside and Ron and I took a small bow saw and headed out into the woods.

I knew where there were some nice pines about the right size and we headed along a path in that direction. As soon as we were out of sight of the house, Ron took my hand and I moved close beside him as we made our way up the hill. There was just enough snow to cover the ground and the temperature was probably in the low thirties so we were actually quite comfortable in the light weight jackets as we walked. I don't think either of us did anything consciously but I remember our hips occasionally sliding against each other as we walked and I remember it as quite a pleasant sensation.

It only took about ten minutes to reach the area with the pines and in another twenty Ron had found a tree he felt was perfect. He crawled under it and cut it and we started dragging it back towards the house. I didn't want us to get back quite so soon, so before we got to the edge of the woods above the house, I said, "Ron, let's leave the tree here for a few minutes. I want to show you something."

He agreed and I desperately tried to think of something that would be of sufficient interest to justify taking him to see. I doubt, really, he would have cared if I showed him anything or not but I started along another path that led to a small stream with a little waterfall. The path was wide enough that we could walk side by side and after a couple of minutes Ron let go of my hand and moved his arm around my waist, pulling me against him. Now our hips were constantly touching and I liked that even better.

We emerged on the bank of the stream and I pointed out the waterfall. Ron said something to the effect that it was very nice but he seemed much more interested in me. I certainly had no problem with that.

We stood side by side, his arm pulling me against him, for several minutes. That time of year the sun goes down pretty early and, especially in the mountains, it quickly becomes dark. It wasn't quite sunset yet but it wouldn't be long and we knew we had probably better get back before dark. Not that there would be any problem finding our way or anything, but parents tend to get concerned a little easily. (Now that I am a parent I understand that much better than I did then.)

I was leaning against Ron, my head on his shoulder, enjoying the feel of his arm around me, and wishing we didn't have to go back so soon. I lifted my head to say something and stopped as I saw Ron staring down at me. I froze for a few seconds and that was time enough for Ron to quietly whisper, "Lisa, you are really beautiful."

I know I'm not too bad. I was five foot seven, I was slim, my face was all right and I had begun to develop some nice curves. Still, I don't think a boy - or any non-relative - had ever called me beautiful. I felt myself freeze and my breath catch slightly as Ron continued to stare. And still longer as his hand moved to lightly stroke my face. I must have still been breathing but I only remember his hand turning my face slightly and then his lips approaching mine. Approaching and then touching and then pressing firmly against them. And my own lips were pressing back just as firmly.

That was my first real kiss. That first one lasted only scant seconds but some of the ones that followed lasted much longer.

We probably only stood there, clinging tightly to each other and kissing repeatedly, for fifteen minutes or so. However long it was, it was far too short. Still, it was long enough for the sun to sink below the mountains and reluctantly we finally separated and, still with our arms around each other's waist, started back.

We pulled the tree next to his parents car and then headed into the house. My dad said, "We were just getting ready to send out a search party. Thought you might have wandered over into Kentucky or somewhere. Afraid you might have frozen, but you look warm enough after all." Again I could see his smile and knew he was teasing but I felt myself turn a little red anyway.

Ron and I continued to date throughout the rest of eighth grade, freshman year and on into sophomore. Not exclusively, but mostly we went out with each other. Since neither of us could drive, we were quite limited in where we could go and what we could do. As far as we were concerned there was nowhere near enough time for us to be alone. On the rare occasions when we were able, we spent as much time as we could learning as much about kissing as was possible, although we really didn't go much beyond that. There was some petting, true, but only outside of clothing.

During our sophomore year we both got driver's licenses and then we could often find somewhere isolated to park and engage in some very serious kissing. But also during the spring of sophomore year we actually began to grow a little apart. We still both enjoyed the romantic activities - or I should say erotic activities, if I am honest. We still didn't go any further but we did really enjoy the kisses. No, it was other things that separated us.

I had become very interested in computers and programming and planned to get a college degree in the field. Ron, on the other hand, had no real academic interest and planned on joining the navy as soon as he finished high school. He never said explicitly, but seemed to think that a woman should not work outside the home and should just follow her husband around wherever he went. In the navy this meant waiting on shore for six months out of twelve. I could never imagine myself in that kind of future.

Anyway, over the spring of sophomore year we grew more apart. We didn't date as often and again started going out with others a little more. We never lost interest in the kissing but we did sort of somewhat lose interest in each other. By summer we had largely stopped going out together.

I did date some other boys and even spent time kissing a couple of them, but never anything as intense as with Ron. While I had thoroughly enjoyed those activities with Ron I had just come to realize he was the wrong boy for me.

My parents must have noticed when we began to see less of each other but they never said anything. However when a couple of weeks went by in May and early June without us going out, my mom finally asked, "Problems with Ron?"

We were alone and I had always been able to talk with her. "Not really a problem. It's just that we've sort of grown apart. I don't think I could ever get serious about him."

We were sitting at the table out back, sipping iced tea. She smiled at me and said, "Nothing lasts forever. Fortunately the bad things don't but neither do the good ones. The trick is to enjoy the good ones while you can and make them last as long as you are able."

I smiled back and just nodded. Later I was to realize that was probably some of the best advice she ever gave me.

That summer passed as had many others. I did date other boys occasionally. Mom, dad and I did a lot of things together. We took a trip over to Virginia Beach for a week and then went up to DC for another week. It was the first time I had had a chance to see any of the museums or monuments and I found myself quite impressed. At home we frequently would take a picnic lunch out into the woods or up to the hidden valley or sometimes over to a nearby state park. All in all it was a good summer and I never had time to regret anything about Ron.

School started and once more I became involved in class work and other school activities. I didn't have my own car but we had a car and a pickup and I could usually have one of those when I wanted to go somewhere.

One Saturday in late September three of us again took a picnic up to the valley. The weather was quite warm and clear but we had already had a few cold nights. When we entered the valley I saw that the asters had mostly gone. Only a few still remained, the rest gone to brown stems. I think the disappointment showed on my face as I said, "Looks like the asters are gone."

Mom touched my arm. "Nothing lasts forever. As you have heard, For everything there is a season.' Just remember the good things will come back again. Enjoy them whenever you can."

My dad smiled and added the often repeated verse,

"Asters in September Frost before the snows fly Violets in the springtime Daisies in July"

I smiled then and said, "Yes. Daisies next July." A lot would happen before the next July.

Four weeks later it was nine o'clock on a rainy Saturday night. The temperature was down in the low thirties. Much more and the rain would become sleet. I was at home and had been working on school work. There was a big project due in another week and I wanted to get it finished early. Mom and dad had gone over to a nearby town that afternoon and said they would probably get some supper over there. I had made a frozen pizza and was again working on the finishing touches of my project.

I thought I heard a car pull up. I was surprised because if it was mom and dad they would have pulled around to the back and it was very rare for anyone else to come out here - especially this time of night. There was a knock on the door and I went to answer it.

Even out here I didn't just open the door to a late night knock. I looked through the peephole. Standing outside was a highway patrol officer, his cruiser behind him. I felt myself knot up a little inside but I managed to open the door.

"Miss Lisa Anderson?" He asked.

I nodded and stepped back. He entered, removed his hat and closed the door behind him.

The look on his face did nothing to untie the knots in my stomach. I think I knew what he was going to say before he said a word.

"Miss Anderson, I'm very sorry to have to tell you this but there has been an accident."

I swallowed. "My parents?" Was all I managed to get out.

He nodded.

Before he could say anything else I said, "They're dead, aren't they?"

I think he was surprised but answered, "I'm afraid so. I'm truly sorry to have to tell you this."

I nodded. In a voice with no inflection whatsoever I asked, "Just what happened." I knew my father - my mother, too, for that matter - was an excellent driver.

He confirmed my thoughts. "It wasn't their fault. A drunk driver ran a stop sign on the highway and knocked them over the hillside. They had no chance and it was instantaneous. The other driver was also killed."

I nodded. I don't know if he expected hysterics or not, but he seemed a little unsure at my reaction. It wasn't that I felt nothing. No, the emotion was there but I would deal with it later in my own way. I had never been one to fly off the handle. I have a very logical mind but sometimes emotion is so strong that you must put it aside until it can be handled in a better fashion.

I have since learned that not everyone reacts like this. In fact, I have been told that it is quite rare. But then I didn't know. I had always met emotional shocks - although never one this bad - in this way. I was always outwardly calm, doing whatever needed to be done at the time, and then later would meet the situation as logically as I could to resolve it.

The trooper asked, "Is there somewhere I can take you? Or someone I can call?"

"My dad's brother lives three miles from here. I would guess he should be told."

Still looking at me with a somewhat perplexed expression on his face he replied, "Why don't I take you over there and I can tell them what happened?" I nodded and went to get my coat.

He drove me over to Uncle Jim's in his cruiser. We went up to the door together and I stood by as he told my uncle, my Aunt Sara and my cousin, Don, what had happened. Their reaction was a little more emotional than mine had been but not hysterical or anything. I think the officer might have said something to them about me being in shock or something but they knew me well enough to know that this was probably the way I would handle things and told him not to worry. They would take care of me.

After twenty minutes or so the trooper left. My aunt and uncle made sure I was all right and in another hour they took me up to a guest room where I could stay.

By the next morning I think I had come to terms with what had happened. I was, of course, extremely sad, but realized it could not be undone. I remembered my mom saying that even good things can't last forever, but to enjoy them while you can. She had also said that more good things would come in their time, even if not the same ones.

I came down to breakfast and I think my aunt and uncle were not really surprised to see that I was in control of myself. They would take me Monday to see about arrangements, notify the school and so on. My uncle had already called the police and found out what needed to be done.

I missed the next week of school. The state sent a social worker out to see me. I was sixteen although I would be seventeen in a couple of weeks. Still I was a minor and the worker said I would need a guardian. They would be able to find me a foster home if needed. At that point my uncle stepped in and said that such would not be necessary. He was now my next of kin and could be responsible. If necessary he could adopt me.

We ended up making one trip to court at the county seat where the judge placed my uncle as the responsible person. Adoption was not needed unless we wanted it. As soon as we returned to my uncle's house, my aunt said I could move into the room I had been using. We could get whatever we needed from my home.

I looked at her. "Aunt Sara, you know me better than that. I'll continue to live at home."

"But the judge made us responsible for you. They won't let you live alone until you're eighteen."

"I'm not living alone. I'm part of this family. I just have my own room and that room happens to be a little farther away than most. Look, you know I can take care of myself. If I ever do need help, you're only a couple of miles off."

She still looked uncertain. Before she could say anything else, I added, "There has been enough of an upheaval already. There's no reason to make things even more different."

Slowly she shook her head back and forth and then smiled. "Lisa, I know you well enough and you are enough like your dad and like Jim that I know I can't change your mind. The only thing I'll say is it would be better if you don't mention your exact arrangements. We don't want the authorities butting in, now do we?"

I smiled back and gave her a hug. "No, we don't. I can handle most things and I know I can count on you and Uncle Jim to help if needed."

The next day I moved back to my own home. When the will was finally probated it really became my own, or would officially when I turned eighteen. I also found that my parents had had an insurance policy. It wasn't huge but it also paid double for accidental death. Additionally the insurance company went after the insurance of the other driver. Fortunately he had been covered. When everything was finally straightened out, I was left with enough to see me through the rest of high school and college. In many ways I was better off financially than I had ever expected to be.

Although I probably appeared to handle everything in a logical, controlled manner, there was definitely an emotional reaction. I just didn't show it as much as many people would, but I was deeply saddened. I loved my parents quite strongly and I missed them terribly. I'm sure there was some depression even if not really clinical. I mean, if I had had no emotional response then there would definitely have been something wrong with me. I had the response but I was able to deal with it in my own fashion. Some things did change. I spent less time with school activities. I didn't attend all the ball games as I always had, although I did make a few of them. It was well into the spring before I dated again and even then it was more casual than romantic. But overall, I managed better than even I would have expected.

My aunt and uncle were always ready to help with anything I needed and my cousin Don, who was a year older than I was, spent a lot of time with me. This did make things a little easier.

I had never really lived by myself but I now found it was not as big a change as I might have expected. I had always helped with the cooking and cleaning and so on, so this was nothing new. I made the change a little smaller by continuing some things we had always done. I actually put up a Christmas tree and decorated the house. When Valentine's Day arrived, I baked a heart shaped cake and then invited my aunt, uncle and cousin over. I even dyed eggs at Easter. As I said, money wasn't really a problem and I quickly learned how to budget and handle any spending needed. There was no mortgage - the land had been ours for generations. Utilities and so on were paid each month along with the property tax when it became due.

I decided to let the corn fields go but to continue with the orchard. I didn't think I could handle all of that on my own but found a man who lived nearby who was willing to help for shares.

That fall I had started my junior year. I was taking all the math and science classes I could. The more I studied these areas the better I liked them. But computers were still my main interest. Also that year I took the SATs and scored pretty well. By spring I had decided to try for Ohio State when I graduated. I was told that with my grades and those SAT scores I shouldn't have any real problem getting in.

My social life continued to move slowly. I did date but not real frequently and none of them developed into any real relationship. It wasn't that I didn't get along or anything. No, it was just that none of the boys really excited me. At least not for a long term serious relationship. There were a couple who definitely knew how to excite me with their kisses. Still, I never went much further with any of them.

I did have a fairly high sex drive but I just couldn't see myself going that far with any of the boys I knew. Not even oral, although I knew a lot of my friends didn't consider that real sex and didn't hesitate along those lines. No, I wasn't "saving" myself or anything. I just wasn't ready to go that far with anyone I knew.

I did, however, relieve a lot of pressure by myself. I even managed to order a vibrator and a couple of other toys over the internet. When they were delivered in a plain package I relaxed and since I lived by myself, used them whenever the urge struck, which was actually quite often.

The year drew to a close. Final exams came and went along with a class picnic and a few parties, two of which I attended. I didn't look for a summer job anywhere. I had decided to keep the orchard going and that would take a fair amount of my time. Besides, I had sufficient money from the insurance. Not the way I would have liked to become financially set, but it was there and I was going to make the best of it. Until August I would have no school work but I still spent quite a bit of time studying programming on my own. I had filled out an application for OSU and waited for an announcement of early admission.

One day in late June I was working by myself out in the orchard. I heard a car pull into the drive and a few seconds later a "beep, beep" from the horn. The orchard isn't that far from the house and I headed back to see who had come.

When I came around the house I saw Don's pickup. He and a second man were standing by it. As I neared, I saw that the second man was a couple of inches taller than Don, and Don was six feet even. He had blonde hair, a little darker than my own, and as I came up to him I saw his eyes were a deep blue.

"Hi, Cousin," Don said. I hadn't seen him for several weeks because he was over at some summer camp for kids, acting as an assistant counselor.

"Hi, yourself," I replied.

He went on. "I'd like you to meet Dan. He was a counselor with me at camp. He's from up in Ohio, but I brought him back for a little visit."

I turned towards Dan. With a wide smile, which I couldn't help but return, he said, "I'm very pleased to meet you. Don said he had a beautiful cousin, but I see he understated it."

I felt myself grow slightly warm but then I looked Dan up and down. "I'm happy to meet you also. Dan hasn't said anything about you or even mentioned your name but I can see he understated that also."

That brought a laugh from both of us. Don was looking back and forth between us. "I see I may have ignited something here." Then he turned towards Dan and added, "But you'd better be a little careful, Dan. She's from West Virginia and can shoot as well as any of us. Don't get her mad."

Another laugh and Dan glanced at Don and then turned to look directly at me and replied, "Well, my family is from Kentucky so I can do pretty well myself. I always catch what I hunt."

I invited them in and brought out some cool drinks. For the next hour we sat around talking, Dan and I getting to know each other a little. I found that like Don, he also was a year older than me. I also discovered he had an interest in technical areas, especially computers, and planned to become an engineer, although he hadn't completely decided exactly what type yet.

When they left, Dan reached out to shake my hand. I'll admit I had found him attractive from the first but there were no bells and whistles. Still, his touch felt almost electric. "You're going to be here a couple of weeks, right?" He nodded. "Then maybe I'll see you again before you go."

A wide smile crossed his face. "You can count on it."

After they left I went back to the orchard but I realized that inside I was feeling something that I hadn't felt for most of the last year.

Three days later I was again out in the orchard when I suddenly heard a loud call from the direction of the house. "Hello! Anyone around?"

Startled, I managed to shout back. "Yes. I'll be right there."

When I got to the house I saw Dan standing by the gate by himself. I moved over towards him, unconsciously straightening my hair as I neared. I suddenly realized what I was doing and quickly pulled my hand back down. "Hi. Here by yourself?"

"That's right. Don has some doctor's appointment for a physical and is gone all day. I decided to walk over and see if his beautiful cousin was around."

With a wicked tease I answered, "I haven't seen her anywhere, but I'm here."

He laughed but slowly looked me up and down. "That's great. I'll always settle for the more beautiful one."

"Did you have something in mind? Or are you just out walking?"

"Oh, I could definitely get something in mind but I wouldn't want you to throw me out. Seriously, I just wanted to get to know you a little better and decided to see if you weren't too busy. Or if you are, maybe I can help with whatever it is that has you busy."

I shook my head and finally answered, "Nothing that can't wait. Say, did you walk the three miles around the road?"

"Sure. Three miles isn't that far. I do a lot of hiking and backpacking. Why, is there another way?"

"Actually, there is. Cross country it's less than half that far. I can show you if you'd like."

"That would be nice. Make it easier the next time I come by to harass you."

To myself I thought "Harass away," but I said, "Look, it's only ten thirty now, but why don't we pack a picnic lunch and I can show you around the place a little and point out the short way back."

"Thanks, I'd like that."

We went inside and I pulled out my day pack and we found some stuff in the kitchen to make an easy lunch. I took a couple of water bottles and a couple of lemonade and stuffed them into the pack. "OK, let me go put on some better shoes." Dan had on hiking boots but I had been wearing an old pair of nearly worn out sneakers. "I'll be right back." I went to my room and in about three minutes I had changed into my own hiking boots. I also replaced the dirty jeans I had been wearing with a pair of short cutoffs as well as putting on a clean tee shirt.

I came back into the kitchen and said, "Let me get the pack and we can go." "I've already got the pack," Dan replied. I looked and he had shouldered it already.

We went out the back and started up the path towards the woods. I hadn't really thought exactly where to take him, but suddenly I knew it would be the valley. As we climbed into the hills I noticed that Dan seemed to be in quite good shape. He must have done a lot of walking or something because he was hardly breathing any faster as we climbed even though we carried on a conversation while we moved.

There were a couple of stream crossings - only a foot or two wide - but he reached to take my hand as I stepped across. And twice he moved in front of me to clear spider webs before I walked into them. He was obviously at home in the woods and just as obviously was naturally polite.

We emerged from the woods and stopped to look at the flat valley floor. I swept my hand across the view and said, "Daisies."

Dan laughed and replied, "I see you are as good at understatement as your cousin." Then in a more serious tone, "They are really very lovely, aren't they?"

"Yes, I've always loved seeing them here. Come on, there is a good picnic place over there by the stream."

We moved to where we could sit on the bank a few feet above the tumbling water, our legs dangling over the edge. For the next half hour we sat side by side, just talking. I should say just talking and admiring the waving sea of white and yellow blossoms surrounding us.

Dan asked a bit about my interest in computers and we soon were involved in some discussion of technical areas. I found him quite knowledgeable and I could see he found me the same way. We seemed to be getting along quite well.

The topics switched to other subjects. We found we both liked camping, hiking, and backpacking. We both enjoyed reading and liked science fiction among other types. Dan surprised me by admitting an interest in historical romances and I surprised him with my interest in adventure stories.

He mentioned Don's comment about my shooting ability and I admitted I had been using a twenty-two since I could walk. Under supervision, of course, until I was ten or twelve or so. Nothing unusual about that in this part of the country. He had a similar background. Neither of us were hunters but enjoyed plinking and target shooting.

I hadn't been paying attention to the time when I happened to notice my watch. "It's nearly two!" I exclaimed.

"In a hurry to go somewhere?" Dan asked.

"No. Just surprised I didn't realize it was past lunch time. Aren't you hungry?"

"I hadn't noticed but now that you mention it, I wouldn't mind eating a little."

"Same here." We pulled things from the pack and, still sitting on the stream bank, proceeded to eat the assortment of things we had brought.

Afterwards we again just sat there and talked. It was surprising how comfortable our relationship was, having known each other for such a short time. I was also finding I would like to get to know this guy quite a bit better. At least I thought so.

We stayed in the valley until nearly six, but at last we stuffed things back into the pack and I showed Dan the trail out of the other end of the valley. There we climbed to the top of a ridge, down the other side and then up a second one. From the top of that one I could point out the trail he would need to take to get back to Don's house.

I took my pack back from Dan. As I was putting it on he said, "Lisa, thanks for taking the time today. It's been wonderful. Look, next week is the fourth of July. Could I take you somewhere to watch fireworks or something?"

I smiled up at him. "I'd love that. Why don't you come over and meet me where we had lunch. Come about eleven and I'll pack a picnic for us. Then later we can go down and take my car. There's usually a pretty good show over in Johnson Creek." Then I added, "That is, if you don't have plans with Don and his family."

He laughed. "I don't think they're planning anything special, but even if they were I'd just tell them that I wanted to spend time with the more beautiful cousin instead." He reached out and took both of my hands in his. "Lisa, I really like you."

"I really like you, too, Dan." Then I surprised both of us by pulling him down and placing a kiss on his lips. Just a few seconds but it definitely affected us both.

On the fourth I woke early and spent an unusual amount of time on getting ready. I normally kept my hair clean and so on but that morning I washed it and brushed it enough to make it really shine. I have fairly light blonde hair and I wore it down below my shoulders. Going out into the woods I usually put it in a pony tail but that morning I just added a velvet ribbon high up and let it hang free. I usually either wore no makeup or very little. I still didn't apply much but I made sure what little I did put on was as near perfect as I could make it. It promised to be a hot day and I chose to look the "country girl," wearing short cutoffs and a shirt with the tails tied to reveal a few inches of bare stomach. It had been over a year since I had felt this excited about a date. While I was examining myself in the mirror I suddenly realized how good it felt.

As I stood there I could almost hear my mother's voice saying, "The good things will come again. Enjoy them whenever you can." I felt my throat tighten a little and just a drop of moisture fill my eyes. But then I gave my eyes a quick wipe, my throat relaxed and a smile came back to my face. In a whisper, but still out loud, I said, "I will, Mom."

I had promised a picnic but this one wouldn't be tuna sandwiches. No, I had bought some cooked shrimp and baked some chicken breasts. Both of these were chilled and I packed them in an insulated bag. I added some small carrots, celery sticks, cheese and crusty French bread. Two pears and some chocolate mints completed the meal. I was too young to buy wine although I was sure I could have gotten some anyway. However, I had no idea if Dan drank alcohol at all, so I put in a bottle of chilled sparkling grape juice. I suppose I read too many romance novels.

I placed everything in a small backpack along with plastic plates, glasses and tableware. I even included a wet washcloth and a small towel. I tied a rolled cotton blanket to the outside and about ten set out for the valley.

I spread the blanket on the bank above the stream and waited impatiently. About ten of eleven I saw Dan coming down the trail that led to Don's place. I was suddenly no longer impatient - just filled with anticipation.

He saw me and moved directly to where I waited. When he was about five feet from me he brought his hand out with something he had behind his back. I stared at the single long stemmed red rose. A perfect bloom.

One of the things we had discovered rather quickly the previous week was that we could tease each other back and forth and still both enjoy it. Even friendly insults. I stared at the rose and then looked around at the field filled to overflowing with clover and daisies. "Coals to Newcastle?"

Dan laughed and answered, "No. Beauty to the beautiful." God, did he read romance novels, too?

I didn't usually blush this much but Dan was doing something to me and I know I must have turned slightly red, and instead of trying to tease I said simply, "Thank you. It's lovely."

The rose was in one of those little plastic tubes of water that come from the florist so I pushed the tube into the ground beside the blanket.

Then I stood and took Dan's hand. "Thank you again." I quickly stretched up and placed a quick kiss on his cheek.

"You are most welcome." He slowly looked me up and down. "And very lovely."

I smiled a response and then said, "I have some food for us. Are you hungry?"

Looking directly into my eyes, his concentration never wavering, he replied, "Very much so."

My breath caught slightly for a second but then I reached into the pack and began to spread out the food. As I uncovered the chilled shrimp and the small container of dipping sauce, the thick slices of chicken breast and the rest, he just watched in silence. Then I brought out the sparkling juice. The bottle looked like champagne but I saw Dan give a quick glance at the label before he smiled at me and said, "Quite a feast." He looked at the bottle and the two glasses I was holding and asked, "Are you trying to seduce me?"

Was I? No, not really. But, even having known him for such a short time, I did definitely feel romantic towards him. I very deliberately batted my eyes at him and then lowered my gaze. "No." Then a little more quietly but still enough that he could hear, I added, "Not yet."

He laughed and took the bottle from me. As he opened it and poured he said, "Sometime we'll have to do this with real wine." He quickly added, "That is, if you'd like that."

"I have had some and I do like the taste. I'm certainly not a real drinker, but I think I would like that some time."

"I'm glad to hear that. Like you I do like the taste of wine sometimes. But don't get the idea I drink a lot - or even a little. I have never been drunk and I don't intend to ever be."

I smiled at him. "Good. With our interests in computers we're both going to need all the brain cells we have."

We both laughed. He placed the bottle aside and I handed him one of the filled glasses. "What shall we drink to?"

He pretended to look thoughtful for a few seconds and then inquired, "To seduction? No, I think to a beautiful young woman. One I would like to get to know much better."

Much more and I would be ready to drink to seduction. Instead I said, "Then also to a most wonderful young man."

He smiled in acknowledgment and we both raised our glasses and took a small sip.

We ate and talked like old friends. Maybe a little more than friends. I'm sure we both felt an attraction even though we also both knew he would be returning to Ohio in about another week. Again my mom's words came back: "Enjoy them whenever you can." Yes, I certainly would.

When we finished the food we remained sitting on the blanket, just talking. Well, just talking for some time. Then, I think without either of us noticing, I found we were holding hands. It felt good and I did nothing to change things, but before too much longer Dan did. In one of the short silences that come any time two people are talking, we sat, just looking into each other's eyes. Then he slowly began to pull on my hand and as I was pulled nearer, he also moved. Almost in a daze I felt myself moving closer until our lips were less than an inch apart. Here he stopped for a short time. I'm sure it was to give me a chance to back off but I had no intention of doing that. Instead I moved to close the gap and soon our lips were pressed tightly together.

We spent the next several hours kissing and making out. Our clothes stayed on and hands stayed on the outside but there was definite sexual arousal. We also did some of the silly things lover do. Once when we were lying side by side on the blanket I pulled a nearby daisy and used it to tickle Dan's nose until he finally took it away from me. He rolled me onto my back and returned the favor, making me laugh as the soft petals moved gently across my upper lip and then over my bare stomach. Then he stopped and bent forward to kiss each eyelid, my nose, my neck and finally my lips. When that kiss ended he pulled back slightly and then bent to kiss the bare skin between my cutoffs and shirt tails. His tongue spent long seconds swirling around and around my belly button and I found myself breathing in hard, shallow gasps. Later I ran my tongue around the inside of his ear and brought a similar reaction from Dan.

We finally ended our play and made our way back to the house. I put the rose in a vase and then we got into my car and drove over to Johnson Creek where we sat holding hands through a great fireworks display. When I finally drove up to Don's house to drop Dan off it was after eleven.

Before he got out of the car he gave me a very nice kiss. Then he said, "Lisa I would very much like to see you some more before I have to leave."

"How about another picnic? Tuesday?"

"That would be wonderful. Same time?"

"Yes." Then I suddenly added, "And Dan, bring a bathing suit. There's a nice pool in the stream below a little waterfall."

"Great! I said I wanted to see more of you." I'm sure part of the reason I suggested swimming was that I wanted an excuse for him to see me in a bikini. For that matter I wanted to see more of him also.

We had that picnic and swim. I wore a shirt and cutoffs again but under them I had on a very brief bikini. Dan had swimming trunks under his jeans but not the baggy kind most boys wore. These were like the ones popular in my parent's time. More like soccer shorts. After our swim we remained in the suits as we spent the next several hours making out.

Twice more before he left for home Dan and I met in the valley. Each time we spent time in serious kissing but we never went much further. Maybe he didn't try because he knew we would soon have to separate. Maybe I didn't try for the same reason. I know we were both quite turned on but I had to content myself with my vibrator later at night.

Finally the day came when Dan would have to leave. We promised to keep in touch with e-mail and chat, which we did. Dan had graduated high school and that year was attending a community college near his home. He wanted to get the basic courses out of the way at a lower cost. Living at home he had time for a part time job so he could save money for a four year school later.

My acceptance to OSU came and I started looking at what courses I'd need the following year. I also spent a lot of time on my senior year courses. Senior level chemistry, physics and math did require some serious study time although I did get the material relatively easily. There were other activities also. I did date a few boys and even spent a little time parked and making out, but nothing as intense as it had been with Dan. In fact, while such activities were enjoyable, no one really excited me like Dan had.

In November I turned eighteen and was then legally an adult. Now no one could question my living alone. I also then had official title to the property and the other resources my parents had left me but I could still call on my aunt and uncle should the need arise.

My cousin had gone to college and was studying to be a forester. One of West Virginia's main products is wood and scientific management of its forests was an important topic. Besides, I knew he had no interest in moving to a city. Like me, Don loved this part of the country and never planned to move far away. I knew there weren't many computer programming jobs in this area but really hoped something would work out.

In May I graduated from high school. It was a little bitter sweet in that my parents could not see me do so, but I accepted that and all in all managed quite well. My aunt and uncle came, of course, and Don even managed to get home for the event. Dan surprised me by having a single rose delivered to me. There were a few graduation parties and such events and then I again settled down to care for the orchard during the summer. Well, that, and spend more time studying a couple of new programming languages on my own.

In June Dan e-mailed and said he was going to be able to get free for a couple of weeks in July. He thought maybe he could get Don to invite him down again. A few days later he wrote that Don was not going to be there. He had a summer job working with the forest service. He was afraid he wouldn't be able to make it after all.

At first I felt very disappointed. I wondered about asking my aunt and uncle to invite him anyway. Then the thought suddenly struck me. Why not? I e-mailed him back and said, "Don't worry about Don. Come stay with me instead."

We opened a chat. "You mean stay in your house?"

"Sure. Why not?" "What will your aunt and uncle, or for that matter, other people, think?"

"Who cares? Besides there's no reason anyone would ever know."

"Really, you wouldn't mind?"

"No! Look, Dan, we don't have to sleep together. What's the difference if you sleep a mile away or in the next room? Seriously, please come."

We finally agreed and in the afternoon of one day in the second week of July, Dan's car pulled up outside. I ran outside and we met with a very long kiss. I had missed him more than I had known. I think the feeling was mutual. Well, I know the "feeling" was mutual - I just meant that we both felt the same way.

I showed Dan into the bedroom he would be using. We then moved to the screened porch out back with some iced tea and some chips where we spent the next three hours catching up. I mean e-mail and chat are great but sometimes things get skipped. You can't see expressions in chat and sometimes you miss a topic that should be explored more fully.

Around six I suggested supper and we went into the kitchen. I had a couple of steaks and together we grilled them on the grill out back. I had stuck some potatoes in the oven about an hour earlier so they were ready when the steaks were. That and a bag of salad made the meal.

Afterwards we cleared the dishes and went back out to the porch to talk some more. I think Dan was a little apprehensive about bedtime even though I had made it clear that we had separate rooms. Actually I guess I was a little apprehensive myself. I almost didn't want separate rooms but that would be a very big step, at least for me. I wanted to be very sure the first time.

On the other hand I did not expect to finish my freshman year at college still a virgin. I wasn't going out for the drink and fuck lifestyle by any means but I somehow felt that probably my status would be changed in the next year. Being the practical person I am I had started on the pill that summer. I knew to be sure you should be taking them for a couple of months. Anyway, when the time was right, I wanted to be ready.

We finally said good night with a long kiss and went to our own rooms. I had moved into my parents' room which had its own three quarter bath. Dan would use the main bath and that way we wouldn't be in any kind of conflict there.

As it was, I got up, showered and dressed and was just heading towards the kitchen when I heard Dan moving around. I called out, "Will you be ready for breakfast in about twenty minutes?"

He answered back, "Sure. Anytime."

I fixed bacon and French toast and had it nearly ready when Dan entered. It suddenly struck me that here I was, being very domestic with a man, even if it had only been half a day. I had never done anything like this except with my parents. Somehow it felt good.

That day and the next we mostly did things around the house. Dan helped me with some work in the orchard. He also helped with the dishes and the cooking and obviously knew what he was doing along those lines. We did take a couple of short walks out in the summer woods but otherwise we just spent the time getting to know each other a little better.

Dan had arrived on a Saturday. Monday I decided that on Tuesday we should do something more interesting and suggested a picnic up in the valley. Dan readily agreed and on Tuesday morning we put together some stuff from what I had in the refrigerator and freezer. No chicken breasts this time but we made sub sandwiches and I did find some cooked shrimp in the freezer. When I was getting the deli meats I suddenly saw a bottle in the back of the refrigerator. I pulled it out and held it up. "I don't remember this being in there," I commented.

Dan laughed. "I would worry if you did remember it. I put it in there last night. I told you we should have champagne some time." Then more seriously he said, "If you don't want it, don't worry. I'm happy either way."

"No, I think it's wonderful. In fact we should take it with us today." I found an insulated bag and filled it with the bottle and ice.

As we were putting things in a pair of small packs Dan asked, "Should I bring anything else? Like a bathing suit?"

"Sure. It's warm enough." Then I gave him a look and teased, "I suspect you just want to get me in a bikini again, right?"

He clasped his hand to his chest. "You wound me. That was not at all my intention. In fact it would make me happier to get you out of a bikini. I would rather you didn't wear anything to swim."

I laughed at his antics. "I think I'll take the suit anyway." We went back into our bedrooms and put on suits beneath our other clothes and I added a couple of small towels to the packs.

By ten we reached the valley and it was once again completely filled with clover and daisies. Dan looked around and asked, "Is this place always full of daisies?"

I laughed. "Not always but every summer. And other seasons there is always something. In the fall there are purple asters and some ironweed and goldenrod. A little later frost flowers, then snow and by spring the whole valley is covered with violets, both purple and white." Then I quoted from my father.

"Asters in September Frost before the snows fly Violets in the springtime Daisies in July"

Dan smiled and I said, "My dad always said that."

I think Dan must have seen something in my eyes because he came over and put his arms around me. "I'm sorry about your parents. I didn't mean to bring back any bad memories."

"You didn't. Those memories are all good." But I stayed in his arms a little longer than needed.

In a few more seconds I pulled back and said, "OK. Want to go for a swim?"

"Sure. I'm always ready for you to take your clothes off."

With most any other boy I had dated, such comments would have sounded vulgar and been unwanted. Somehow when Dan said such things I found them welcome. I think maybe it was that we could tease back and forth and I knew that when he said such things he was just doing that. Well, maybe not JUST doing that, but it wasn't a vulgar sexual comment.

I answered in kind. "Oh, I would have thought that you would have preferred to take them off for me yourself."

A gleam came into his eyes and he said, "That's a wonderful idea." He started towards me and I first laughed but then started backing slightly away. He was faster and caught my arm pulling me into a kiss while he held me tightly against him. The last couple of days we had definitely spent some time in kissing but never in a really long make out session or anything. Now his kiss felt hotter than usual and I kissed back just as hard.

I suddenly realized he had started unbuttoning my shirt and let my hands pull back from around his neck. He caught my wrists and said, "No, you suggested it, didn't you?"

With my breath beginning to come a little faster I slowly nodded and let him finish. He slipped the shirt from my shoulders, leaving only the bikini top which was more string than bikini. I held still as he reached for the snap on my cutoffs and very soon they followed the shirt. He unfastened my shoes and I pushed them off my feet. He looked me slowly up and down and in almost a whisper said, "You really are a beautiful woman."

Still breathing a little fast I reached for his shirt buttons. "Only fair," I softly said. In another minute he was wearing only the short trunks. I'll admit I looked at him as intently as he looked at me.

At last we broke the spell and turned towards the pool below the falls. For the next half hour we splashed around, stopping now and then to kiss. We left the water at last, drying our faces with the small towels and moved back to where we had spread the blanket on the grassy bluff.

Nothing was said but we both stretched out in the sun and then turned towards each other. This kiss went on for a long time and when it ended we were both aware that a nice make out session would probably follow. We were right. For the next hour we lay together, mouths locked, tongues exploring, hands roaming. Dan placed his hand over my breast and gave a slight squeeze. The suit top only covered part of it so I felt his finger tips on all sides. I wanted to feel more.

I put my mouth against his ear and said, "Dan, you missed something when you took my shirt off. I still seem to have the suit top on. Please remedy that."

He froze for a second and asked, "Are you sure, Lisa?"

I nodded. "Yes. Do it." He did.

He pulled me against him again and this time the touch of his skin on my bare breasts sent shocks throughout my system. But not nearly the shocks which followed when his fingers grasped my nipple. Then even those paled as a few minutes later his mouth moved to replace his fingers. I had never felt anything like this. Not with any other boy. Not when I played with myself. My eyes closed and I moaned.

Dan continued to stimulate me and I arched to aid him and continued to moan. I could feel his hard member pressing against me through his trunks. I had no experience in these matters but he felt rather large and the thought of that made me flood lower down.

I let my hand grasp him through the thin cloth, exciting both of us. My hand wrapped around the hard, hot flesh and I felt myself flood with the desire to be penetrated. Any experience with my vibrator paled in comparison. I let go bringing a groan from Dan but then changed that to a long sigh as I slipped my hand inside his trunks to grasp him directly.

"Oh, Dan, I want you. I want you now."

Breathing quite hard he managed to say, "I want you, too. More than I could have imagined. I don't have any condoms."

We stopped, his hand holding my left breast, mine wrapped around his stiff organ. "Dan, I've never done this before, but I am on the pill. Do I have to worry about catching anything from you?"

He looked slightly embarrassed. "No" Then he somewhat sheepishly added, "I've never done this before either."

I think I must have looked rather startled. "You haven't? But you seem to know what you are doing so well."

"No, I never have." A second later he added, "I guess I read the right things. But you seem to know exactly what to do, too."

"Instinct." I gave him a squeeze. "You said something about being ready to take my clothes off. Why don't you complete that now?"

He smiled and gave my nipple a quick kiss. In another five seconds the strings on my suit bottom were loose and that slight garment was lying beside us. Not many seconds more and I made his trunks join it.

We stopped long enough to look each other over, an act which seemed to make both of us breathe a little faster. I looked at his erection. It did seem quite large to me, probably somewhere between six and seven inches although I wasn't measuring at that time. Then I suddenly had the urge to do what some of my friends had talked about but I had never even tried. I leaned forwards and placed my lips on the end. Dan sucked in his breath which I took as a favorable sign. I felt no aversion or hesitation and used my tongue to give a couple of licks. Then I thought I might as well go the whole way and opened my mouth to take a couple of inches of the rigid tool inside. I let my mouth slide up and down several times, sliding my tongue all around, while Dan made loud moaning sounds. In a few seconds however he pulled slightly back and gasped, "Not yet, Lisa. I want to last longer."

I raised my head and he kissed me, undoubtedly tasting himself along with me but he didn't hesitate at all. His hand moved to between my legs where he found that I was soaked and when his finger touched, it slid in easily. He moved his finger in and out several times and then suddenly moved his own head between my legs. When his mouth touched I nearly screamed as an incredible excitement raced throughout my body. His tongue began to stroke up and down my slit and I cried out, "Yes! Yes! Yes!" as I began to feel myself start to come. Dan continued to lick and even press his tongue into me throughout until my contractions slowed a little.

"You liked that?" He asked.

"I loved it!" I gasped out. Then I had to ask, "Did you like it?"

"More than I can say. You taste wonderful."

I knew a lot of girls didn't like that activity at all but I also knew that some thought it was great. I was with the latter ones.

During this exchange we had not been still, our hands sliding over bare flesh, our bodies squirming against each other. I reached to grasp Dan's rigid organ once more and tugged it towards where we both wanted it. Dan moved above me, holding himself slightly up with his hands. I rubbed the head of his rigid rod against my slit a couple of times and then brought him to the soaked entrance. I looked up into his eyes, finding them looking directly back into mine. "Are you sure?" he simply asked.

"Yes! Just do it." With that he started to push inside. The sensation was unlike anything I had ever known. Never had my own touch or the little bit of petting in which I had engaged excited me like this. I could feel my entire world shrink to that small area between my thighs as the hot flesh slid deeper. Then I felt a resistance, a push back from something within. Dan hesitated slightly and I cried out, "Now, Dan," and he drove harder. I felt a very small sharp pain but the wonderful sensation overwhelmed any discomfort in a single second. Later I would realize that most likely my hymen was probably already at least mostly torn but at the time all I felt beyond that one slight sting was unbelievable pleasure.

My hands were tightly against Dan's back, pulling him against me, urging him deeper. They slid down to grasp his ass and I could feel my fingers digging hard into his firm muscles. It must have been instinct because neither of us had had any real experience at this but somehow we started to move together. My world continued to exclude anything beyond our joined bodies and I felt myself flying higher and higher. It couldn't have been very long but it felt like both forever and less than an instant when Dan's body tightened and I felt him drive hard against me and then his hot flood as it was released inside me.

This was the trigger. I was no stranger to orgasms, although self induced, but this was as unlike what I had known as a candle to a forest fire. My whole world exploded and I felt myself flying apart. Little pieces of Lisa spreading out and out and out to fill the void of the entire universe while I ceased to exist leaving only a beautiful flower of hot and brightly colored sparks. These faded to black and the void was back. Slowly I felt myself coming back together.

I opened my eyes to see Dan's blue ones looking back at me with an expression of awe. He was still deeply inside, still semi-rigid and our arms were still locked tightly about each other. "Oh, Lisa, that was more wonderful than I ever dreamed."

"Yes, oh yes! I've never felt anything like that. Never!"

He kissed me, first on my eyelids, then my nose and then my lips. This last turned into a hard and deep French kiss and our bodies seemed to once more grind against each other of their own accord. For several minutes our tongues played together and I felt Dan once again grow hard. Soon we were moving against each other once more and this time it went on for much longer. Much longer but maybe not as much as we would have liked. When Dan again exploded inside me I had another quite satisfying orgasm although not as strong as that first one.

We finally separated and lay quietly, still touching, our hands gently stroking, occasionally coming back together for a nice kiss. "That was wonderful, Dan."

"You don't regret it?"

"Not at all! This was the right time and you are definitely the right man. Are you sorry for anything?"

"No. Unless that it's the fact that I have to go back in another couple of weeks." I must have looked a little uncertain because he added, "But not forever. You'll be going to OSU in another month or so and Columbus isn't that far away from me. We can still see each other - as long as you want to."

"I want to. Oh, Dan, you must know I've been attracted to you since we first met. I don't know if it will be forever but I want to find out. For now, I know it's good."

We lay together for another hour. After some time I said, "Aren't you getting hungry? Should we get dressed and have lunch?"

Slowly he looked at me and answered, "I do feel hungry. Let's have lunch, but ..." After a few seconds he finished, "I like the way you are dressed now."

My breath caught in my throat. "You want to eat lunch naked?" I asked incredulously. He slowly nodded. For a couple of seconds I remained still. Then I felt a smile cross my face. "All right. I'll take that as a dare. As long as you stay dressed the same."

He returned the smile. "Deal. We can have the sandwiches." Then with a leer he added, "And I'll eat you for dessert."

I felt my face warm but I also felt my breathing quicken and a few interesting twinges from lower down.

We did stay naked and ate, sitting side by side, our hips and thighs touching. We ate and fed tidbits to each other. A couple of times we also cleaned a smear of food from the other's lips with a kiss. Much better than a napkin. I would never have guessed that I would find a meal like this as exciting as it was. And afterwards Dan kept his word and brought me to three nice climaxes with his tongue. And I found that a real blow job was exciting to both of us. Surprising even myself I found no repugnance in the act or even the taste as I swallowed when Dan climaxed in my mouth. Despite this being the first time for both of us we were discovering that we both truly loved every aspect of sex we had tried.

Again we lay in the sun for a while. Then we had another swim but this time we didn't bother with the suits. In fact we remained nude all afternoon and into the early evening, mostly just being together, talking and gently touching each other.

The day had been quite warm - even without our heated activities - and we were quite comfortable in only skin. Even after the sun had set and a nearly full moon had begun to rise we were not chilled at all.

We had moved over to a nice area of soft grass and clover and were no longer using the blanket. All around us were the millions of daisies and the sweet smell of the red and white clover blossoms. We were lying side by side on our fronts, Dan's hand rubbing my back and bottom, our legs touching along their length, when he asked, "How are you feeling?"

"You mean physically? You know there was only a tiny spot of blood. I think my hymen must have been already largely gone. I'm fine."

"That's good but actually I meant more emotionally. No regrets at all?"

"Not in the least. I'm happier than I could have imagined. Don't I look it?"

"Yes, you definitely do look happy. Not to mention incredibly sexy. In fact, if this were a musical you would probably be about to burst into song."

I laughed and replied, "Oh, what should I be singing?" Then before he could answer I suddenly exclaimed, "I know what!" I let him wonder for a second then took a deep breath and began,

"Roll me oooover, In the cloooover, Roll me over in the clover, Do it again."

At that point we both broke up laughing but when we got our breath back Dan did exactly as I had said.

It was after nine when we finally packed up everything, got dressed once more and headed back to the house. Once there Dan didn't even go to his room. There was no question that now we would both be using mine. Also no question that neither of us would need pajamas.

For the next two weeks we went nowhere else and saw no one except each other. We saw all of each other quite frequently, both in bed and outside. We made several trips back to the daisy filled valley where we did roll each other over in the clover again and again. We had discovered a wonderful new world and we both were determined to enjoy it as much as we could.

The night before Dan had to leave I doubt either of us got more than two hours of sleep, but at eighteen and nineteen we could get away with that. We promised to keep in close contact and for the rest of the summer there were long e-mails or chat sessions every day. Many would probably have embarrassed even the NSA guys if they had been intercepting us.

Near the end of August I left for Ohio State. As a freshman I would be living in a dorm. This didn't bother me as I wasn't expecting a wild social life there. The only male I now had an interest in was Dan. He felt ... right is the only word for it. While I had liked the other boys I had dated, some quite well, none had ever felt like this. Not that they were totally wrong, but each, in their own way, had been lacking, and if they weren't completely right, I thought, then they were wrong for me. Dan was completely right.

Was I in love with him? Yes, I'm sure I was but neither of us ever said so. I think we were both waiting to see if it was just a passing fling. We wanted to be sure.

I quickly became involved with my classes and Dan mentioned some of his also. We continued to stay in contact electronically and every few days by phone. Class work took up a lot of our time and communicating with each other a fair amount also, but I still found time for a few non-academic activities. I attended a couple of dances, played some spontaneous touch football games, and attended a couple of movies with a group from my dorm. Dan occasionally mentioned some similar activity in which he engaged but never seemed to be really involved with any of them.

Then Saturday of the fourth week of classes I got a call from the desk in the dorm. "Lisa, there's a man here who says he needs to talk with you about something. He asked if you could come down to the lobby."

"He didn't say what? Or who he is or represents?"

"No, just said it was personal and asked if I could get you down here."

"OK, I'll be right down." I supposed it might be some legal matter concerning my parents' estate or the property or something similar we had missed earlier. I went down the stairs and when I entered the lobby and looked around, I froze. There, not six feet from the door was Dan. He had a smile on his face but a somewhat serious look and I was a little unsure just what this was all about. His e-mails had given no hint that he might come here. I moved closer to him and started to ask, "What are you doing here?" but before I could get the question out he brought his hand out from behind his back. In it was a single long stemmed red rose. He then said simply, "Lisa, I love you."

I don't think I had ever been so filled with emotion in my life as I rushed to wrap my arms around him, pulling him tightly against me and, through tears of happiness, I managed to say what I had realized to be true myself. "I love you, Dan. I love you."

It was a college dorm after all so no one thought it really unusual that we locked into a long kiss right there in the lobby. When we finally broke apart I did manage to ask why he was here.

He smiled and finally said, "Well, I live here. Lisa, I transferred to OSU this year. I didn't tell you because I wanted to give you a chance to find out if you'd be happier meeting other men. I didn't want to rush you into anything."

Seriously I said, "You haven't, Dan. I think I fell in love with you the first time we met. No one else has interested me since." I gave him another kiss. "Where are you living?"

"I have a small apartment across High Street. Would you like to come see it?"

"I'd love to. Do you have a roommate?"

"Yes, but he's gone home this weekend. How soon will you be ready to come over."

I looked directly into his eyes. "Since last July." He smiled and took my hand as we started out of the dorm. I didn't come back until Sunday evening.

My freshman year was happier and more exciting than I could ever have imagined. Dan and I were together whenever we could be and happily his roommate went home a lot of weekends. On those weekends I lived in his apartment. I didn't actually move any clothes over there - in fact I generally didn't need clothes while we were there. We did do a lot of other things together besides sex, but we never tired of that.

The next July Dan again came to visit - for nearly a month this time. It was a wonderful time, one of the very good times and, as my mother had said, I did my best to enjoy it. In fact the wonderful good time has continued with only small interruptions of more somber feelings. Sophomore year I also moved into an apartment with one roommate. Between the two we could usually have an apartment to ourselves about two weekends out of three or four.

Spring break of sophomore year we went back to my place. The weather was still a little cool for making love outdoors - we'd wait until July for that - but we made good use of the house and not always in the bedroom. We did spend a lot of time out walking in the spring woods, though. One day we took a picnic out to the valley so Dan could see the carpet of lovely violets. The temperature was in the low sixties but it was sunny so we could be comfortable in jeans and light jackets.

When we had finished lunch we just relaxed in the sunshine, me on Dan's lap. We exchanged a few kisses and a couple of "I love you"s. As I lay my head back on Dan's shoulder he said, "Lisa."

I smiled up at him. "Yep, that's me."

"Lisa, I'd like to ask you something."

"Sure."

He took my left hand in his and brought something out of his pocket. I stared at the bright sparkle of the ring as he said, "Lisa, will you marry me? I love you."

I think my heart must have stopped for several beats and then my arms were around his neck and between kisses I was saying, "Oh, yes, Dan. I love you. I love you."

This next would be my junior year and Dan's senior and we decided to wait awhile before we actually got married but we got an apartment together that year. By the summer after my junior year we saw no reason to wait any longer and were married. We had the wedding back home with my aunt and uncle doing a lot of the work. Dan and I spent a week over at Cumberland Falls but then the rest of our honeymoon was at my place - now our place - much of it in the valley. By August we both had a very nice tan - all over.

My senior year and Dan's first in grad school were almost a continuation of that honeymoon. A very good time and we both did as much as we could to enjoy it. I honestly don't think there was ever a single day in which we both didn't say, "I love you." And it wasn't just words. Our actions said it as well and not just the physical side, although that definitely said it as well.

Dan completed his Masters the next year and I started on mine. Then one more as I finished mine while Dan worked for a local company. But by then he had proven himself enough to become independent and I, well, I had also done some free lancing and between the two of us we did quite well as independent programmers, working on contract for a number of different clients.

I had never lost my love of the mountains and Dan had come to love them as much as I do. Working as independents we could live anywhere so when we discussed it, a lot wasn't required to decide to move back here. Two years later Amber entered our lives.

Now I open my eyes and glance at my watch. "Amber," I call out. "Time to go get ready to go see your cousins."

"All right, Mommy," she answers and starts running towards me. Like when I was her age, she rarely goes anywhere at less than a run.

I take her hand and we start back towards the house. At the edge of the valley she stops and looks back. "Will the daisies still be there the next time we come?" she asks.

"Probably. But if not then the asters will be." She nods and smiles and turns to go.

As we come into the house her dad meets us. "Daddy," Amber exclaims, "There are a million daisies up there. Mommy says they may still be there next time. If not there will be asters."

"That's right, Pipsqueak.

Asters in September Frost before the snows fly Violets in the springtime Daisies in July'"

I hear my father's words and a little mist fills my eyes, but I smile at Amber's grin. Dan turns to me and says, "All finished and the program sent off." He comments, "Now we just wait for a check in the mail."

"Great. Now I'd better get Amber ready to run over to Don's."

"OK, I'll put a picnic supper together for us while you do."

Fifteen minutes later Amber and I get into the car and head out for the short drive. When I return, Dan is waiting with a small day pack and a blanket. "Let's go up to the valley. Our daughter says there are at least a million daisies there."

I laugh. "Sounds good to me." We head out the door and make the walk up to the valley. It doesn't seem quite as far as it used to when I was Amber's age, but it's still just as exciting.

Dan has an exotic meal: chilled shrimp, cubes of ham, chicken and cheese along with some raw vegetables and dip. And a chilled bottle of wine.

After we finish the food and are still sipping the wine from plastic cups, I tease, "What? No dessert?"

He smiles at me. "Oh, I thought we might eat each other for dessert." We both laugh.

The sun is just dropping below the tree tops. I set down my wine glass and survey the blooms of daisies and clover. Many more than a million I think. Then looking directly into Dan's eyes I start unbuttoning my shirt. When the last button is free, still looking at him, I spread my arms wide, take a deep breath and begin,

"Roll me oooover, In the cloooover, Roll me over in the clover, Do it again, do it again."

Before I can start another verse Dan does exactly that.

As moonlight begins to make it over the trees to mix silvery light with the jet black shadows across our bare bodies I notice a hard to describe feeling below my stomach. For a second I think about the calendar. Yes, quite possible. A smile crosses my face along with the moon light. By next July Amber may well have a little brother.