John & Carol
written by:
Just_John

Note from Author: It's been a while since I've posted anything. This story is a relatively long romance story about the blossoming of love between two unlikely characters. There is sex in it but if that's all you want look in the latter pages. I hope you like the story, I've lived vicariously through it while writing it. If you like it or not please let me know. As always this is a work of fiction, any similarity to any persons is purely coincidental and this story is intended for adults, and where legal. If you don't like this kind of fiction please don't read it.

Thanks for taking the time to check out my story... JJ

As they walked into the chalet after placing their skis against the house John and Carol shook the snow from their jackets. John sat down in the foyer on the floor to take his boots off, Carol stood there expectantly looking at John. He always seemed to be off somewhere in his own world, with a purpose no one else could understand.

The chalet was decorated in dark natural stained wood, deep and rich, the carpet light, almost white. It made John uncomfortable, afraid that he'd track mud in, or spill his coffee as he was always at risk of doing. It wasn't that he was clumsy, actually just the opposite, he was athletic, coordinated... occupied.

Carol never understood John. She couldn't understand how he always seemed so distracted when she was with him. She was almost 10 years his senior. At 31 she was well established, nearing tenure having taught for 6 years as a professor in physics. She was tall with long hair, trim without being skinny, and she had a habit of slumping slightly which served to take the emphasis off her breasts. They weren't overly large, very well shaped and they attracted attention, which embarrassed her. While not quite a wall flower she was demure, reserved... her expressive eyes were brown, sparkling, to compliment her hair. Her style of clothes was also reserved, long loose shirts, the same for the skirts she customarily wore to school.

She had met John on the Bus trip up, over a hundred people staying 12 to a chalet. John arrived late, the bus already running, and of course the only open seat on the bus was next to the physics professor. The group was made up of primarily students with a smattering of professors. For the next ten days there was no student-professor status, just young people and older people.

Carol thought the trip would be a chance for her to meet some of the people she worked with, a chance to get to know them out of the confines of school where tenure, time in grade, the pecking order of the grad students and their subservience to the professors had everyone on guard. She thought more of the professors would be on the trip and she almost cancelled when she found that very few of the professors decided to go. Of the hundred or so people that went, only a few were professors.

She'd tried the bar scene and found it grotesque. The men always seemed standoffish, and the few that approached her scattered when they found she was a physics professor. She didn't realize that most men found her, if not beautiful, well up on the attractive scale. Her grace and beauty put them on the defensive, most feeling she had to be out of their league, the ones that took a shot not able with the challenge of a beautiful, smart woman. Her fear of social interaction seeming to them to be arrogance, stuffiness perhaps. She thought she'd try the ski trip as a chance to get to know some of the people around the school.

John was quiet when he settled in the seat breathing hard.

"I'm late again, huh?"

Carol laughed. "Yeah, we were waiting for you." As if in proof of her statement the bus started with a rumble, the gears groaned in protest and the bus began to move.

Carol was always at a loss in these situations, talking to someone she didn't know. She got so frustrated with herself knowing it was a catch 22, not being able to talk to anyone until she got to know them, and not being able to get to know people without talking to them. "Do you get to ski often?" she asked. ‘Christ' she thought, ‘why didn't I just ask him if he lived around here, where you from? If I told you that you had a nice body would you hold it against me?' Hmmm... where the hell did that train of thought come from?

"No not really, I used to ski a lot when I was little but I haven't been in a while."

"So you ski well?" She cringed with the inane nature of the question. God she sucked at this.

"I used to." John mumbled as he leaned over and took a novel out of his back pack. He leaned against the window the book in his lap and settled a little in the seat. His message was clear... This conversation is over.

‘Oh, my god...' John thought. This is the best looking woman I've ever seen. ‘I wonder if her body matches her face. God I wish I was better at talking to women. What do I talk to her about?' John sat quietly trying to come up with some topic he could talk to her about. ‘Oh my god... that's the physics professor... what's her last name? shit I wish I could remember...'

Carol leaned back in her chair, put her head back and closed her eyes as the bus pulled out of the parking lot. It was going to be a long ten days she thought. She glanced around the bus and saw that people seemed comfortable in the pairs of seats, quiet conversations, some of the guys playing cards. She felt awkward, out of place.

"Hey John, I didn't see you get on the bus!" The cute blonde in the row in front of them was kneeling on her seat and looking at John with a look of hope, fascination, dripping with opportunity.

"I was running a little late." John looked down at his book.

"I'm glad you made it John, will you ski with me this week?" The blonde turned on a brilliant smile, clean white teeth, almost too white. Her blonde hair silky smooth, finely textured, tucked behind ears that were petite, almost the perfect example of what a woman's ears should look like. Carol realized that this had to be the most beautiful person she had ever seen. She turned to look at John's reaction, thinking that she didn't have the tools to compete with that in any forum.

John was looking down at his book again, the message was clear that he didn't want to talk to her right now.

"Sure." Just this side of rude, as non-committal as it could be.

Carol watched the look of frustration, the look of defeat on the blonde's face, the slight crease of her brow. She wondered what guy wouldn't be pursuing the blonde. Maybe she had a fat ass or something. Maybe she missed something when John slid into the seat.

She glanced over at John. He was attractive without being gorgeous. His face was chisled, a firm chin, high cheek bones, not a dark complexion, perhaps olive was the right description. His shoulders were broad, but in his jacket she really couldn't determine his body. He was attractive but not at the level where a blonde of that caliber wouldn't be a significant conquest.

"You're a professor..." His question sounding like a statement, surprised Carol out of her musings. It sounded almost like an accusation. ‘Brilliant. I am so freaking brilliant. Come on John, think of something... ‘ John's mind raced, trying to come up with something witty, some beginning of a conversation, some way to let her know he wasn't some mindless twit.

"Yes."

"Physics right?"

"Yeah how'd you know? Were you in my class?"

"No." He looked out the window and Carol figured that question wouldn't get answered. She couldn't figure out whether he was just not a conversationalist or if he was just that arrogant.

"What's your major?" She asked. He smiled, and looked at her. ‘God, that was the college equivalent to where do you live.' She thought.

"Business." His reply was curt, almost saying it was none of her business. She was struggling to figure out whether he wanted to talk to her or not. His demeanor, his tone was saying that he didn't but he had started the conversation. He was giving her a headache.

"You don't talk much do you?"

"Not Really." ‘God I suck at this... shit.' John thought.

They settled into silence once again. Carol just wanted the trip to end, she wanted to get away from this guy, she wanted to be with somebody she had something in common with, god she hoped she'd find someone to hang out with once they got there.

The trip took several hours and it was dark by the time they got to the mountains. The bus pulled up to chalets, the driver reading off the list of who stayed in which chalet. Carol was surprised to find that John was in the same chalet. The cute blonde mumbled her displeasure when she found that she was not in John's Chalet. Carol couldn't understand why she found pleasure in that. She listened as the blonde asked John for his cell phone number and found that she was carefully trying to memorize it as John rattled it off.

She watched as John walked up to a group of guys smiling, shaking hands. She overheard their conversation as they waited for the others to pull their bags and skis out of the bus. "Got stuck with the Physics professor huh?" laughing and patting him on the back. She felt her cheeks redden, her head dropped, she couldn't understand the feeling of humiliation she felt, and she turned her back.

"Yeah... She's pretty cool..."

Carol turned her head quickly to look at him. They'd said what... 25 words in the four hour trip. What gave him the right to judge her? When she looked at him he smiled at her, just a slight curling of the lips, but she could see his eyes twinkle. She didn't know why but that really pissed her off. She glared at him and walked away listening to the others laughing and giving John a hard time.

As she settled into the chalet she found that not everyone had a bed. Some were destined to sleep on mattresses on the floor. There was a group of four or five that would sleep in the living room, the others were paired up in the bed rooms. Carol was the only person that got her own bedroom and it singled her out, made her feel different, more out of place than she already felt. It was obvious that she was the only "single" here.

She looked up as John and his friends walked in. John looked at the list and said "Nah... We don't need a room Billy, let's let Bob and Marge sleep in there." She could tell that Billy wasn't happy about that but John had put him on the spot, in a position that he couldn't say no. The arrogant ass!

She found out who Marge was when she ran up to John hugging him. "Thank you John..."

Carol wandered off to her room and found it small, a single bed in the corner, a dresser, and she had her own TV. She didn't watch it much but it was nice that she had her own little sanctuary to hide in. She set about taking her clothes out of her suit case and arranging them neatly in the drawers. When she finished and walked back into the living room she saw the younger people, the "students" as she thought of them, arranged around the kitchen table. Beers and sodas in front of them she could tell they were in for the duration. She went into the living room and found John sitting on the couch, beer in hand, lounging with his feet on the coffee table.

"How's it going teach?"

"Don't call me that." John just smiled and nodded looking away at the TV. A basketball game was on, the one sport Carol hated above all others. She never understood the male fascination of watching over grown adults try to throw a ball through a hoop, but she wasn't ready to sleep yet so she sat in the overstuffed arm chair.

"Who ya skiing with tomorrow?" John asked.

"I don't know." She felt an anger rising, and really couldn't understand why the bitch in her was rearing its ugly head. Perhaps it was that she didn't know anyone on the trip, she felt out of place and he just seemed to find all the subjects where she was less than confident. He just rubbed her wrong. "One of the girls I presume."

"Which mountain are you going to ski?"

"I don't know, I guess it depends."

"Oh. You don't talk much do you?"

She heard her own words mocking her and couldn't help herself. "Don't mock me little boy... I don't need your shit tonight."

John laughed. "Ok then, I guess we're done." And he stood up and walked into the kitchen sliding onto one of the benches of the kitchen table. The act of him laughing at her incensed her, she wanted to walk up to him and hit him, to scream at him, to yell and curse at him. She wanted to crawl into a hole and die. She sat in the chair and glared at John as he talked freely, comfortably with the others. He made them laugh, when he spoke they listened to him, he was a natural leader.

She watched him control the conversation, smile quietly. She watched as the girls vied for his attention, the stupid little girls. How could they want such a cold asshole, but it was unmistakable. There was a competition for his attention. John looked over at her while she sat with a look of complete hatred on her face, she had never had anyone that pissed her off more with less words and she couldn't understand it. She found the subtle smile he gave her smug, insufferable and she finally stood and walked into her room in a huff, pissed that he didn't seem to notice.

What was it with this asshole? Why did he continually piss her off, why couldn't she stop thinking about him? He instinctively brought out the bitch out in her, the arrogant little shit. She was at least 10 years older than him, why did it seem that he always had the upper hand.

John watched her leave the room. Thinking... ‘good job John. Not sure what I said but I definitely pissed her off. She's out of my league, older, smart, beautiful, the last thing she'd want is some young buck idiot.'

She found that the first thing she thought of the following morning was John. "Mr. arrogant" as she had dubbed him. She quickly grabbed a piece of toast from the stack on the kitchen table, added a couple of strips of bacon and walked quietly through the living room on her way to the front door as she took her first bite. John was lying on a mattress looking at her as she tip toed through the room.

"If you didn't cook, you're supposed to clean. House rules."

She stopped, looked at him... "What?"

"If you didn't cook you're supposed to wash the dishes. You didn't cook, did you wash any dishes?"

"Fuck you."

"Oh! She's got a potty mouth too!"

She was angry and embarrassed. She didn't know the rules and he called her on it. A student telling a tenured professor what to do. The bastard.

"Yeah well... fuck you." She was embarrassed that she couldn't come up with a better retort. Tears came to her eyes as she stormed through the room, slammed the door behind her, grabbed her skis and went to the ski slopes. ‘Why is he doing this to me? I'm fucking miserable, and he's making it worse. Fuck him!... Fuck him, fuck him, fuck him!'

‘Shit, just when the situation calls for silence is when you talk the most. Damn, it was supposed to be a joke, I thought maybe she'd smile.'

She took the cable car to the midway station, put her skis on and slid over to the chair lift. Her cheeks stung where the tears had dried in the bitter cold wind of the mountain. As she sat down on the ski lift she felt it lift her into the air.

"Hi."

She looked over at her lift mate, a middle aged guy, goofy hat but high quality ski clothes, his face angular, his eyes dark.

"Hi."

"Come here often?" he asked and laughed.

"No first time. I came here with a group of students."

"You're a teacher?"

"A professor."

"Really? What do you teach?"

"Physics, at the university."

"m' names Jim... Nice to meet you." A subtle southern drawl.

They talked comfortably the rest of the trip up. Carol felt comfortable for the first time since she got on the stupid bus next to "him." She found out that Jim was divorced but in a serious relationship, was here with his kids that were old enough to not really want to be with him anymore, and skiing alone for the day. The lift got to the top and Carol skied confidently from the lift to the top of the slope. It had been a while since she had skied but it came back to her quickly. She took wide turns and carefully made her way down the slope. She came to a bump in the slope, over which it looked as if the slope went down a cliff it was so steep. Concentrating, carefully sliding from one side to the other and turning slowly she made her way down the steep part. Each time she turned, as her skis passed the point where they were pointed directly down the slope her heart raced. She found the sun, the wind, the cold, the moments of fear exhilarating.

As she picked up speed and confidence she over balanced, it seemed in slow motion as she watched her ski tips cross at the exact moment that she was pointed down slope. Her increase of speed was alarming, she tried to lift her foot to uncross her skis but became even more unstable. She fell to one side and as soon as she did she started to roll. Luckily, her bindings released as they were intended and she found herself sliding down the hill. As the steep part ended and the slope flattened out a little she came to a rest and looked back up the slope. Her skis were back up the slope, and her legs sunk into the soft snow as she tried to walk back up to her skis.

She struggled for a moment or two and looked up into a cloud of spray. As she wiped her eyes she heard that voice...

"Oh man! Are you ok teach?" John stood there comfortably on his skis looking at her intently.

"My name is Carol!" she responded, the pinnacle of bitchiness.

"I know, you told me, remember? Are you ok?"

"I'm fine, leave me alone."

"Here's your skis..." He leaned over to put them side by side so she could step into them. She grabbed them and pulled them down the slope a little, losing her balance in the deep snow and falling over. Again she was embarrassed by this kid, when she rolled over she saw him looking at her, a warm smile, quickly replaced by that aloof, smug expressionless gaze.

She threw the skis down and started to step into them.

"I think it's easier if you point them across the hill, not down."

"Shut up." And as her boot clicked into the binding the ski began to move and she fell over once again. "Fuck."

"Ya know, for a professor, you sure do have a limited vocabulary."

"Fuck you."

He laughed. "See?"

"ok, try this... you're a smug arrogant little shit and you piss me off."

"Well I didn't particularly care for the message but at least you're speaking in complete sentences now. That's a start."

"Why are you bothering me?" Like a pissed off parent to a petulant child.

"I didn't think bringing your skis down the hill would be bothering you." John replied reasonably. "If you'd like I can always take them back up there."

"Fuck you."

He just smiled, shook his head and skied away, smooth flowing curves, snow spraying at each turn, effortlessly controlling his speed, skis locked together as if they were tied. His skiing showed an effortless and powerful grace.

‘Shit, shit shit... All I was trying to do was help. I should just stay away from her. Maybe I can switch chalets with some one.'

‘Why does he do this to me. All he did was bring me my skis, I never even said thank you, all I said was "fuck you." Oh god!' She thought.

‘Shit' John thought again trying to, but not succeeding in getting her out of his head. ‘What did I do to her? All she does is get mad at me. If I bring her skis to her I'm bothering her, if I don't then I'm a... what did she say? A smug arrogant little shit? What the fuck was that all about?'

He thought about the bus trip, sitting there for four hours. What do you say to a professor of physics? He struggled to talk to girls in the first place, even the ones that giggled at him like that brainless blonde on the bus, Becky. But what do you talk to a professor of physics about? She was obviously brilliant and he knew if he opened his mouth he'd seem like a stupid young child to her. She was so beautiful, but she never smiled. I bet she has a beautiful smile. He couldn't get her out of his head all morning. He mindlessly skied, rode the lift and skied back down.

At lunch, in the lodge at the midpoint, he took a tray full of food and made his way into the large seating area. Empty seats were sprinkled here and there through the thick crowd. He looked closer and saw a chair next to a woman with long brown hair and quickly walked towards it. Carol looked at him as he sat down.

"Hi." He said.

She looked across the room, nodding. "Your friends are over there."

"I know, but is it ok if I sit with you?"

"Why? All I seem to be able to say to you is ‘fuck you'"

Again that warm smile she saw a glimpse of on the mountain. Her heart fluttered.

"Well, I haven't really been the great orator either have I?"

"You bring out the bitch in me."

"I noticed." That made her smile and his heart leaped. Her smile was every bit as beautiful as he thought it would be. "You have a pretty smile."

He watched her face as it registered surprise, then something he couldn't quite interpret, then anger. The smile disappeared quickly.

"Like I said your friends are over there."

"Carol, Doctor Quinlan, can we try to be friends? Can we try not to hate each other for the rest of the week? I'm not sure what I've done."

"How do you know my last name?" Her tone once again that of the bitch. He smiled and pointed to her chest. Her name was embroidered on the sweatshirt, one of her tenure presents from her graduate student. Her cheeks flushed.

"Fuck you."

"Now... why this time?"

"You embarrass me."

"You asked and I answered." He stood up, reached for his tray, his face an expressionless mask. She reached out and grabbed his wrist, his heart fluttered when she did. He looked down at her long smooth fingers.

"Please... don't walk away... I'm... I'm sorry."

"Why not? Haven't quite reached your quota of ‘fuck you's' for the day?"

"I'm sorry, I... I... I'm kind of out of place here, I don't know anyone, and even though I keep saying fuck you, you're the only one I've spoken to. It's going to be a really long week, Please... Stay... peace. Ok?"

She couldn't believe that all that flowed from her mouth. It was almost as if she vomited the words they flowed so quickly and inexorably from her. She was stricken and her eyes started to water. She was the professor, the calm strong professional woman and here she was, sitting in front of a kid at least 10 years younger than she was feeling more vulnerable than she ever had before.

His heart fluttered, he so desperately wanted to reach out and take her into his arms, to hold her and protect her.

"I'll tell you what Dr. Quinlan. If you stop saying nothing other than fuck you to me, I'll do my best not to embarrass you. Deal?"

"You're doing it again..."

"Doin' what?"

"You're taking the only two words I can seem to put together away from me. What will we talk about?"

"Ya know I was wondering the exact same thing for four hours on the bus yesterday. What do you talk to the most beautiful physics professor that ever walked the face of the earth about?"

"That was a compliment right?"

"Of course! Why wouldn't it be?"

"The ‘physics professor' part makes me sound like a 60 year old bald headed fat man. It wouldn't be hard to be the most beautiful physics professor now would it?"

"You have nothing to worry about Dr. Quinlan"

"My name's Carol." And she smiled at him.

"That's the second time you've said that to me today... I liked this time better." His heart fluttered again as she smiled at him.

She turned out to be a lot easier to talk to than John had considered possible. She laughed easily, she seemed interested in what he had to say, she talked passionately about her work. She had a habit of leaning towards him when she found something significant, or to emphasize the subject. John found himself leaning towards her, wishing he could just kiss her. He focused on her lips as she spoke and found himself drifting off, wondering how soft they were, how she kissed, what she would do if he leaned in towards her, slowly, tilting his head....

"John... John... you there?"

"Uh, umm... huh? Yeah... Hey, do you want to ski? We've got time for another run or two before we have to head down."

"No you go ahead, I'm going to start down now... Maybe if I get down there a little early I'll get the shower first." She smiled at John and again his heart fluttered.

"Is it alright if I come with you?"

"To the shower? I don't think so!" she laughed, a sound he felt intensely compelling... smooth, soft, honest. His mind instantly filled with thoughts of what she looked like in the shower.

‘God.' John thought. ‘this is going to go no where. What could she possibly see in me? She's right, I should go, I wonder what's going on tonight? Shit... I don't even care.'

"I guess I'll find someone we know out there. Thanks Carol, I really enjoyed the lunch." He smiled that smile she found fascinating. She found herself wishing she could make him smile over and over again.

‘What could he possibly see in me... I'm practically old enough to be his mother. Ok I would've been 10 when I had him but still... He'll go after the blonde... I don't have a chance.'

He reached out and took her hand, his intense look into her eyes as he shook it shook more than her hand. She watched him as he walked out of the room and watched through the windows as he put on his skis. She saw ‘the blonde' ski up to him as he pushed his way to the chair lift, her smile full of anticipation as he got on the lift with her and their chair lifted up into the blue sky. Carol couldn't understand the intense dislike she felt for the blonde and the feeling of sadness that swept over her.

"Hey John! I've been looking for you all day!" Becky said.

"I was just eating lunch."

"Well, now that I found you... let's go! This red slope's really cool, it's been a blast all day. That's where everyone else is. Where have you been all day? I've been skiing with Bob and Bill, Marge was with us for a while too... we're going out tonight... to a bar in town... want to go? I only fell once today, lost my skis and everything it was so funny..."

Becky kept up the inane banter but John was lost to it. On his mind was the ease with which he could talk to Carol, the warmth he felt sitting with her. The anticipation he felt, wanting to get back down, to see her again, if even just across the room. He'd never felt this way about a woman before, never really cared before. Why couldn't he stop thinking about her? He knew it was useless, there's no way she'd be interested in him.

"Ok, then... we'll ski down and come up one more time... then when we get down we'll get ready and you'll meet us at the bar right?"

"Uh... yeah sure..."

‘Aw shit.' John thought, what did I do that for?

"Uh, Becky, I'm getting tired, I'm just going to ski down to the Chalet from here. Ok?"

"Hey! There's Marge, ok John... but I'll see you tonight right? You promised..."

He didn't remember promising. "Probably."

He started down the slope, skiing skillfully and fast, finally concentrating on nothing other than the bumps in front of him, eyes scanning the slope, picking out the best route, adjusting, checking speed, feeling the acceleration as he smoothly shifted his weight from side to side, knees absorbing the shocks. He passed the halfway point, the bottom of the chair lift and watched the cable car working it's way up the hill, now empty on the way up, a few people in the car headed down. He looked to see if he could see Carol's skis, a glimpse of Carol on the cable car, anything, but it was too far away.

As he neared the end of the run he saw her. Standing cross wise to the slope, leaning on her pole talking to a guy. He looked older than her, well dressed, stupid hat. She smiled and laughed at something he had said. John was looking at her when the mogul came out of no where. His knees couldn't absorb all of the shock and he launched into the air.

‘Oh fuck!' John thought as his eyes, now totally focused, tried to calculate his landing area. It was going to be close, but if he could just hang a little farther he'd reach the far side of the bump, it smoothed out beyond it and maybe he could get it under control. It was going to be close.

Carol was listening to Jim's jokes, a strained smile on her face, wanting nothing more than to get to the Chalet. She saw the movement out of the corner of her eye, the movement in the air, and as she turned her head she watched John smoothly land, his turns slowing his speed, she watched as he navigated the final few bumps before the end of the slope. The power and gracefulness as he controlled his decent made her heart flutter once again. ‘What is it about that fucking guy. He never even looked at me, the bastard. Why is he so fascinating? God I wish I was 10 years younger.'

John leaned over to take his skis off and Carol said, "Jim, I really have to go... Maybe I'll see you tomorrow ok?"

"Carol, come to dinner with me, I have reservations but I know the kids are going to want to go their own way, please..."

"Jim, I'm tired. I'm really not up to it tonight, perhaps a rain check?"

"I'll see you tomorrow then? The Mid Station? Say 9:00?"

"ok. Bye."

‘Shit. Did I just agree to meet him? I just want to go... I want to get to John before he walks away... shit why am I chasing this kid? I know it'll never work, I know he's not possibly interested in me. I can't help it... I just can't...' Carol thought as she skied down to John.

"Nice jump!" Carol said as she stopped next to John. He had just picked up his skis and put them on his shoulder.

John laughed, "thanks."

"You're headed back?"

"Um... it would certainly seem so huh?"

"Fuck you." But this time it was quiet, almost with a smile as Carol looked at John's eyes. They were brown, textured, intelligent. They made her knees weak.

His eyes turned cold and distant, "I thought you were going to park the bitch bit for the week."

She watched as his eyes first softened, then grew narrow, looking at her intently as if looking through her.

"You said you'd stop embarrassing me too..."

"I guess that was kind of smart assed huh?"

"You could say that."

He laughed, a deep resonating sound.

"Come on, Professor Carol, let me carry your skis. Hey, the crowd's all going out tonight, do you want to go with us?"

"Oh... I'm a little long in the tooth to go partying with you all... don't ya think?"

"Come on Doc, I thought we were gonna be friends this week. That means coming out with us."

"John I really don't think so. I'd just be in the way, slow things down..."

John hung his head and walked in silence next to her. She could see the hurt in his eyes. She didn't mean it like that. She wanted more than anything in the world to go out with this guy. To sit across the table and look longingly into his eyes, but she knew if she went, the difference in their ages would be just that much more apparent. That it would push him farther away, as if there was any chance at all.

"Carol, I'd really like to spend some time with you, I... I... mean, I'd really like it if you'd come with us." He wouldn't look at her, even looked away at the mountain as he walked slowly. "I promise it won't be that bad, please..."

‘God Damn it... I suck at this. I've never wanted a girl like this before... I have no idea what to do... What am I doing?' John thought.

"I'll think about it... ok? I... I... I mean, I'd love to go out with you, I just don't want to be a damper on your evening..."

"Prove it."

"What do you mean John?"

"Prove that you'd go out with me."

"How? What do you mean?"

"Go to Dinner with me. Have drinks with me."

"Like on a date?"

"No not a date! Well, I mean... well, yeah ok like on a date..."

"John, I'm ten years older than you..."

"Never mind then. Shit."

She could see the hurt in his eyes and she never wanted to see him hurt again. She wanted to reach out and hold his hand, put her arms around him, pull him to her. She wanted to feel his warmth, feel the strength of his arms around her. God what this guy did to her! She'd never felt this way before.

"Ok, I'll go."

"Really?"

"Yes, but not dinner, we're supposed to eat with the group, we'll go out and have a drink after..."

He looked at her and her knees felt weak again. The smile that lit up his face was priceless, like a young child on Christmas morning.

He set her skis on the rack next to the door and held it for her as she walked in. She took her boots off and watched as he pulled his off, pulled his hat off. She smiled at him as he gave her a lopsided grin, his brown hair tousled.

"I'll see you in a bit John." She called over her shoulder as she walked up the stairs to her room.

When John walked out of the bathroom, feet bare, a sweater and jeans the attire for the evening he saw her sitting on the couch, her hand hanging over the couch kind of rubbing the over sized ruck sack that was his suit case for the week, he physically came to a halt. She was stunning. Her long brown hair cascading down over her shoulders shone in the firelight, flickering with the images on the TV. A glass of red wine in her other hand, stretched out over the back of the couch. Her white sweater would be too much on any other woman, but on her it was elegant, a slight flicker of gold in the fabric. Her legs tucked under her as she sat on the end of the couch, ultimately feminine.

‘god! How do women sit like that? My knees would break or I'd be crippled for a week.' John thought. He wanted to sit on the couch next to her, put his head on her shoulder, lean up and kiss her.

She looked up as he stepped into the room, hair wet, tousled, pulling his sweater over his head. He was so naturally masculine.

"Hey Dr. Carol... How's it goin'?"

"Dr. Carol?" Bob laughed. "When did you guys get so chummy?"

Carol blushed and John watched the look of hurt cross her face. He got angry but checked his retort. He reached down and angrily pulled his bag closer so he could grab some socks. Carol thought he was angry with her, she was hurt and she felt ostracized again.

"why did I come here... It would've been better never to have met him."

"The professor and the student? That's rich." Bob was laughing and Todd walked into the room laughing too. Carol felt the target for them all, she wanted to sink into the couch and disappear.

"Bob, shut up asshole." John's voice was quiet but had a quality that made Carol look up at him. He wasn't looking up but Carol could see his hands shake a little.

"oooh... strike a little close to home John?" Todd Laughed again.

"Bob," John's voice low but menacing. "I'm going to make you a deal... If you shut up now you'll walk out of the room without any broken limbs."

"And now he's threatening me with violence! I think he's smitten! Come on John, you can't be serious, you and the professor?" Bob and Todd were laughing and Carol wanted to die, die now, ‘please dear god... take me now' she thought.

John stood up and walked over to Bob, taking him by the arm, John propelled him to the door, and then through it. Not roughly, but firmly. The door closed and Carol listened very closely.

"Bob, I like her, you're making her uncomfortable. If you do it again I'll fuck you up. Got it?" The menace was clear and Bob's response was equally clear.

"Come on man! She's a prof. She don't count!"

"I've warned you. I won't warn you again."

"Awright John ok... Jeeze man! Shit, you really like her huh?"

"I do... I really do."

"Fuck man, I've never seen you like this before... I was just kiddin'... Ok ok, any friend of yours as they say... You really like her?" As if he couldn't believe John could really like her.

"Yeah I really do... a lot... I mean... I've never met anyone like her before. I'd like to get to know her a lot better, like talking to her you dick." Carol could imagine the snide look he just got with that comment and was a little reassured by the quick retort. "but she's older than me, way out of my league... You fuck this up and I'll hurt ya. Got it buddy?"

"you know nothin's going to come of this... Look stop wasting your time... I know Becky wants you... It's guaranteed... a sure thing and you're going to waste it on her? Shit, you'll never get anywhere with the prof, the ice princess." "Prof" sure sounded like a disease and ice princess was the kiss of death. Why did people think that Carol wondered.

"I know... I know... I'll never get anywhere... It's not like that... I'm not talking about getting into her pants, I just like her... I like talking to her. Just don't make her feel uncomfortable ok? Give her a chance... Make sure the others don't give her a hard time either... ok? For Me?"

"Is that another threat?" Bob laughed...

"It's a promise."

‘Oh god...' she thought, ‘that's all I need, what if he tries something with me? What if I tell him no... is he going to pull that macho shit with me?' Carol felt the fear rise and looked up as John walked in the room, the firm look still on his face. As his gaze landed on her, his expression softened, his cheeks blushed, he averted his eyes but they kept coming back.

‘I don't have to be afraid of him... He's afraid of me.' She smiled at him, his head dropped but he smiled shyly back at her. She felt her cheeks redden and averted her gaze.

"Dr. Quinlan, I'm sorry, I was only kidding."

"It's ok Bob... Can you call me Carol this week? Please?"

"Sure!" Todd looked at Carol, then at John, silently nodded his head and went back into the Kitchen as John settled on the couch.

"John, I don't want to make your week uncomfortable. I don't want to get in your way, I don't want to stop you from having fun with your friends."

"Carol, you're not and please don't feel that way."

She reached down and held onto his hand, watching as he blushed again, looking away, but he didn't pull his hand away.

As a group of the kids burst through the door talking a mile a minute Carol slipped her hand from John's. He felt as if he'd lost something, a part of him had gone away, almost a sadness. The group was talking a mile a minute about their day this one fell, that one wiped out, normal après ski talk.

The group moved to the kitchen table where dinner was being served by Bob and Todd. John and Carol joined them, finding seats across from each other. Carol sat there quietly feeling like an outsider, an observer of the group.

"Aw man! You should've seen Carol fall today! Skis one way, she went the other! Man she wiped out." John was smiling, his eyes twinkling as he looked at Carol.

The group laughed and looked at her. And again she felt like an object, out of place.

"Who'd you ski with?" Bob asked.

"by myself." Carol responded.

"No way! Really? Tomorrow you ski with us, right John?"

He looked at her and smiled and once again she melted. His eyes twinkled with mischief. "Absolutely! I want to watch her fall again..." As he laughed the questions started.

"What runs did you ski Carol? Who'd you eat lunch with?" And the conversation fell into the routine. She found the group friendly, open. The conversation flowed and she finally felt like part of the group. They talked about school, and she told them stories of the politics that went through the school. They asked her about this professor and that, what were they really like, which ones were weird which ones funny, what did professors think of students, and then Carol just became a part of the group, a part of the conversation.

She looked over at John and he smiled shyly at her. She mouthed "thank you" to him and he smiled again. She found his ankle with her foot and slowly rubbed it. It jerked back away from her. She had a little trouble but finally pinned it against the leg of the table. He flushed and was quiet.

"Come on let's go! The others are meeting at the Admiral Fell Inn around the corner. Who's going?"

Carol was sad to see the evening effectively end for her with Todd's question. She knew they'd all go, She knew John had no choice but to go with them. As they stood John and Carol stayed at the table.

"I have to go Carol..."

"I know. Go, have a good time."

"Come with us... please Carol."

Marge walked into the room, pulling her coat on. "Come on you two! Aren't you coming?"

John rose reluctantly, his eyes asking again for Carol to go.

"Carol, hurry up. Get your coat." Marge was persistant.

"No... you guys go ahead... I'll just stay here and read a book."

"Come on Carol! We're not leaving here without you. John likes you, that means you're my friend too... I'm not going out and leaving a friend here alone. Let's go, you're making everyone wait."

As they walked down the street John couldn't get close to Carol. The men and the women congregated in separate groups naturally. The guys talking about the day, planning what runs they wanted to do the next day, the women talking about the men. As they settled in the bar Carol listened to the girls talk about the men, she could tell the pecking order of the group by the way the women addressed the men. She didn't hear much about John. The few comments she heard making it was obvious that he was beyond the pecking order. He seemed almost to be a sacred topic, above the common gossip that the girls talked about the others.

The bar was full and a group of students, Becky among them, waved them to an over large picnic table. The table was covered by a large plastic red and white checked table cloth, with benches that ran down each side. Everyone was talking at once and the sound was deafening.

Marge sat down next to Carol on the bench stool.

"John has the hots for you." She said quietly. With the volume of the sound surrounding them, the quiet comment was as if they were in a cone of silence.

"Oh he does not!"

"He really does. He's never been one to really give a shit about girls. Don't get me wrong, I know he likes girls, but he's never been one to really care. He's so intense, so into school, into work he never really has time for us. He's never concentrated on any one of us. I was tempted to throw my line in that pool once or twice but he wasn't interested in me. He's the leader of the group. He doesn't talk much but when he does every one really listens. He's just more driven that the rest. There isn't a girl around that wouldn't want to be with him. And he wants you."

"How do you know he... has the hots for me then?" Carol laughed.

"I saw the way he looked at you, and the way he didn't look at you. I've never seen him look at anyone like that. When we asked if you guys were coming he wouldn't look at you. He was afraid you'd say no."

"Is that why you made me come?"

"Well, I wanted to try to get to know you a little better. If John looks at you like that, if John likes you, you must be pretty special. I know he thinks so."

"I like him too..." Carol blushed and lowered her eyes.

"I'll warn you. He's like a brother to all of us. A distracted brother but a brother just the same. You'll have girls wanting to claw your eyes out because he likes you, and if you hurt him, I'll want to claw your eyes out. I love him... I always have. And I'm not alone."

"It's not like that. I'm 10 years older than he is, I've seen Becky sniffing around, I don't have a chance..."

"I could never see him with Becky. Maybe for a dalliance but never anything serious. You, I could see him with. He's smart, he's funny, he's worth a mint and he's too serious for anyone our age. Take my word for it. You two are perfect together."

"Really?"

"Yeah, but I'll give you a little advice. You're going to have to go after him. It's not that he thinks he's above you, but he's got this inferiority complex thing going. He always has. I know he can seem arrogant sometimes, it's not that he's arrogant he's just... occupied. I wish someone would think about me that intensely... shit I wish he'd think about me that intently... He's afraid of women. Even though the girls seem to flock to him, he'll never make the first move. I don't think he knows how."

"He already made the move... He asked me out for drinks tonight. Alone, just the two of us."

"No way! Really? Ooh he's got it bad! What the hell are you doing here with us then?" Marge started to laugh.

"I shot him down at first. But he kept asking until I said yes."

"He asked you? That's a first. I've never heard of him being in pursuit of any woman, in flight from perhaps, but never in pursuit."

Carol watched as John walked towards the bathroom, and then he veered out the door front door of the bar. Carol rose quietly and Marge looked to where she was looking.

"Don't hurt him Carol."

"I couldn't Marge. I just couldn't"

Carol couldn't see the smile on Marge's face as she walked away. She found John leaning on the railing looking at the sky quietly.

"Hi."

John looked at her.

"What are you thinking about? Tomorrow?"

"I was thinking about you. We were supposed to go on a date."

"You're not having fun with your friends?"

"Carol, I don't know how to deal with this... I don't think... I don't... think we should go out..." Carols' heart sunk, she waited for him to tell her why it was a bad idea, to leave him alone, that she was too old, too different, something.

"Deal with what John." That tone, just this side of bitchy, trying to hide her disappointment behind it.

"Deal with you. Deal with the way I feel about you... I can't... God I sound like a fucking fifteen year old."

"Deal with me? What am I a conquest or something? A fucking target like the others? A mindless object that you have to deal with? Sorry to be such a pain in your ass."

"Park the bitchiness Carol."

"Why?"

"Because it's the one thing about you I don't like. I was sitting here thinking about how to get you away from them. How could I get you alone. Now you're here and I can't talk. That's what you do to me. That's what no one has ever done to me before. I know you think I'm just a kid Carol, I know nothing could ever come of it."

She looked at him, his gaze at her was intense, piercing. "I know, to you I'm just a guy, a young guy, a student. Your ticket to being in the group, but when you look at me... like that. My heart flutters, my knees get weak. I've never felt like this before. I can't... I can't go out with you... and... mean nothing to you... Maybe I should just go away."

"John, shut up."

"I knew it."

"John... Shhh... Shut up."

"Carol, I don't know what to do..."

Carol reached up and touched his face, his cheek. Her hand slid around his head and pulled it down to her. She looked at him intensely, like she was trying to decide if what he was saying was the truth. Their lips met, softly. She leaned into him her arms coming up around his neck, his sliding around her back, holding her close, tightly. She pulled back to look into his eyes but his head slid to her shoulder his arms still tight like he'd never let her go, like if he let go he would lose her, she would disappear as if only a dream.

"I'm afraid you'll disappear."

‘Is he reading my mind?' she thought.

"Carol, there's a lot about me you don't know. Nothing scary but there's... stuff... I'll have to tell you. But I have to know. Do you have... feelings for me?"

She was at once the happiest she'd ever been and felt her heart breaking at the same time.

"John, this could be... difficult."

"Shit."

"John, Stop it. Please, I listened to you, now you listen to me. You heard Bob's reaction to you even giving me the time of day today. What's he going to say when he find's out it's more than that? What are the rest of your friends going to say? Can you deal with that? Can you deal with it when my friends find out about this? That doesn't even start to deal with what happens when the university finds out about this."

"I knew this could never happen."

"John, shut up." He winced.

"John, all that said, when I look at you my heart pounds. When you talk to me I can't hear anything else in the room. When I held your hand on the couch this evening I couldn't breathe. I've never felt like this before. I don't know what to do either John. But we have to go carefully, slowly. I want to see where this brings us but slowly. Ok?"

He leaned down, and kissed her. She'd never felt a more moving kiss, full of passion, soft and gentle. She never wanted it to end. His lips parted, hands on her back and she melted into him, feeling his chest pressing against her breasts, his thighs against hers. She was lost in the embrace, feeling a heat in her belly that she'd never felt before. She felt him growing against her pelvis and fought the urge to press against it, to rub against it like a bitch in heat. He pulled back and looked at her. She sensed more than saw his cheeks flush in the dim light.

"I'm sorry, sometimes it does that."

She laughed. "It's ok John."

"You didn't feel anything?"

"I did John."

"You're serious?"

"John! You couldn't tell? That was the most amazing kiss I've ever had and I know there's more. I want you, I want to be as close to you as I can be, I want my arms around you, I want to feel your body against mine... with... with nothing between them. I... I... want to be one with you."

"How do you control that? How do you hide it so well?"

"What do you want me to do? Rip off my clothes and lay in the street for you? We have to go slow. We have to be careful John. John, trust me... please..."

He leaned down to kiss her again. They were so focused on each other they didn't see, in the shadows, Becky watching them kiss. The frown on her face was unmistakable. The menace in her glare was obvious as she watched the passion. She slid back through the door quietly before they parted.

John sat down quietly in the noisy bar. He watched as Carol came back from the rest room and sat down. He quietly watched her, the expressions on her face, the way her hair flowed and shone. Her long neck, graceful, and strong. She didn't look ten years older than the group, she was energetic, funny, bright and as intriguing to the rest of the group as she was to him. He couldn't understand how she could so easily go from their conversation outside to this. As if it didn't matter to her.

She glanced up the table at him and fell silent as she looked at him. She saw him looking at her and blushed, lowering her eyes. Her head tilted slightly, shoulder raised a little, long hair in a curve down over her shoulder. She smiled and he melted once again. ‘God, how does she do that to me? Why does she do that to me?'

The lights flickered with last call and John stood. The group gathered their jackets and began to file out. Carol tried to subtly move through the crowd to be next to John, but just as she was moving up next to him she felt Becky's shoulder push her forcefully out of the way.

"Hey John! It's still early. Want to come check out our place? We have a hot tub. Come on please?"

"Becky, I don't have a suit with me and I'm tired. I want to get up early and ski tomorrow. Tonight's not a good night... Maybe some other time ok?"

Carol saw Bob smile and shake his head, then look at Carol. The expression on his face was... doubtful, concerned. Carol understood that Bob didn't approve, that John meant something to him. Carol flushed under Bob's gaze, smiling shyly at him. She watched as Marge slid in next to Bob and took his hand, she smiled at Carol too. Carol smiled back shyly.

"Hey Becky! Come here..."

Carol slid in next to John as Becky walked over to Marge.

"Hi."

"Hi Teach..." John smiled at her reaction. A mix between anger and regret. "Careful right?"

Carol leaned towards him and whispered in his ear, "Fuck you"

John laughed and his arm went around her shoulders, pulling her close to him.

"John..." Carol was mixed with emotions, feeling so right, so home in his arm, at the same time afraid of the reaction of the people around them. "Careful?"

John kissed her cheek. "I can't Carol... I can't help it."

Carol gave in and walked quietly, close to John, smelling him, feeling his arm burning into her. She never felt more right in her life. She looked at Bob and he was smiling now, almost as if in acceptance.

Carol and John sat on the couch, the TV playing quietly, snores of the guys sleeping in the living room subtle, a background rumble.

"John, aren't you going to sleep, it's almost three o'clock."

"You're sitting on my bed and I don't want you to go."

"Oh John, what are we going to do? John, I could lose my job, you could lose your friends..."

"I don't care Carol... I mean about my friends... I... I... mean, if it's important to me they should understand. If they don't then they're not friends. Right? But, I don't want you to lose your job. Shit." The last word sounding anguished.

"John, I... I've been thinking about it... about my job I mean... what it means to me. We don't... we don't know where this will go. Am I just a plaything for you for the week? Is this the beginning of something serious? Is it worth losing my career over?"

"Carol, I've never felt this way before... I've never... this is just so intense to me, I can't stop thinking about you, can't stop... my heart breaks every time I look at you from across the room. I can't get enough of you, I want to talk with you, sit in silence with you, wrap my arms around you. I never want to be away from you. Is that enough?"

Carol leaned over and brushed his lips with hers, taking his hand in hers. He kissed her back, his lips parting, his tongue searching for hers, tasting her, feeling her. She melted against him, wanting contact with him, to be close to him, to feel his heart beat. He felt her resistance drain from her, felt his faltering too. This was right, this was everything he ever thought love could be. Could he possibly be in love with her so soon? Does it really happen this way? There was no other answer.

"I love you."

Carol pulled back and looked in his eyes.

"What?"

"I love you..."

"You can't John... it's too soon..."

"Carol, you'll get used to the idea in time, it's not going to change."

"John, really... it's just... it's..."

"You don't feel anything? Not even a little reciprocation?"

"Oh god..."

"It's ok Carol, I love you, I have the rest of our lives to get you to love me back."

"I already do John... I have from the first moment I saw you. I don't know why but I do. I can't help it either. John, what are we going to do? How can I be near you all week but not be with you... I can't... I can't just sit across the room from you and watch you... Watch Becky hit on you over and over again..."

"Then let's be together."

Carol leaned over and pushed John back on the couch, her head resting on his chest.

"I love you John, just hold me... please..."

John held her gently, like a piece of priceless china. Wanting a firm grip to keep from dropping it but not squeezing it hard enough to break it. He leaned down and kissed her hair, smelling her shampoo, feeling her hands on his chest, listening to her breathing settle down, become rhythmical. He knew she was falling asleep. He stroked her hair gently, absently thinking of all the things that could go wrong... all the things that were right... how right this felt.

He woke and it was still dark. He felt his erection pressed into her thigh and tried to move away. She followed him, still sleeping. The feelings washed over him and he held her tighter again kissing her hair. His arm was numb, his fingers tingling and he smiled in the darkness.

Carefully pulling his arm from under her, trying not to wake her, he did none the less. She rolled over, her back to him on the couch. He could feel her pressed against him, the full length of his body. There was little room on the couch for the both of them. She pulled his arm over her and held it between her breasts against her chest. He could feel the rhythmic rising and falling of her chest as he lay there quietly in the darkness, could feel the pressure of her buttocks against his groin, her feet tangled with his.

‘God, is this what she calls taking things slow? I should wake her so she can go to bed. No one will know... I wonder what time it is.'

He felt rhythmic pressure against his crotch, his erection. He couldn't tell if his erection was a result of natural nocturnal rising or if it was a function of being with her, nestled between her cheeks. He tried to press back against the couch, to remove himself from it, even though it felt so good, but there was no where to go. He tried to pull his arm out of her grasp, to remove his hand from between the warmth of her breasts but she held on tighter.

"Carol... Carol..." he whispered in the darkness. "Carol... You should go to your room..."

"huh? What time is it?"

"It's almost 4:30..."

"You want me to go?"

"No Carol, I don't, but I know you should..."

"Shhh... Just let me lay here with you a little while longer love... please..."

"Carol, what if someone wakes up?"

"I don't care..."

She pulled his hand tighter around her, holding it tightly, his arm between her breasts, his hand touching her cheek. She nuzzled it and moaned quietly in the dark. "Mmmm, this is nice."

John felt her cheek tighten as she smiled. The weight of her breasts against his arm increased the male reaction to the proximity of a beautiful desirable female. He felt his cock twitch.

"I'm sorry, I can't help that."

"I'm glad you can't, it feels good."

Carol took his hand and slid it down to her breast. John's finger felt her nipple through the fabric of her sweater and bra, hardening. He so wanted to take it between his fingers.

"John..."

"Yes..."

"Tell me again..."

‘Oh shit... what does she want me to tell her again... what have I told her...' John wondered, then it struck him like a ton of bricks, he almost started laughing, knowing that was the worst thing he could do.

"I love you Carol. I truly love you."

"mmm... I love you too baby... I want to stay here in your arms forever, I never want to leave."

She pressed back against him and he felt the rhythmic contractions of her ass as she pressed against him. He felt her wiggle her ass slowly, seductively against him, he felt the tingles as she slid against him, shocked that the feelings could be so intense through the sheer fabric of her pants and the coarse fabric of his jeans. He wasn't 17 anymore he was 21 for crying out loud. What was she going to think when he started to moan. He wanted to hold her tight, he wanted to feel her body against his forever, but more than that he didn't want to embarrass himself.

"Come on Carol, please... if you don't want anyone to find out you have to go..."

"You feel good John."

Her hand reached over her side behind her and he felt her fingers slide across his erection. He couldn't help it and pressed into her hand.

"Oh god Carol, that feels good."

"You feel good my love... I want to make you feel better." She fumbled with the button at the top of his jeans and quietly slid the zipper of his pants down. She let go to roll over, facing him, her hand sliding down once again to take him into her grip.

"God, John, you are so hard..."

"You made me that way Carol..."

"You feel so good." She whispered as her hand slid up and down his length. Her fingers curled around his shaft, her palm rubbing the head with each downward stroke.

"oh, Carol... God that feels good." He couldn't touch her, only hold her tightly as she stroked him. He knew if he put his arm between them too she would fall off the couch. The cool softness of her hand stroking him was more than he could bear and he knew it was only a matter of time, and not much time.

"Carol, you have to stop... please..."

"It doesn't feel good John? You don't like this?" She had stopped stroking him, holding him in her hand. The tone of voice was hurt and it broke John's heart. He never wanted to hear her hurt, to see her unhappy, ever.

"No Carol... It feels good... too good... if you don't... don't stop I'm gonna... soon."

"I want you to John, I want to make you feel good."

"I'll make a mess Carol, of your sweater, the couch..."

"I don't care John..." She began stroking again, squeezing a little more forcefully, hand moving a little faster now... John's breathing in her ear was like music to her. She stroked him, tighter and faster, slowing slightly when he got too close, she learned what he liked and didn't by listening to his breathing. She held him, taut and vibrating for moments that seemed like hours and a second at the same time. She couldn't get enough of the velvety feel of the hard shaft in her hand. She wanted him to cum but she never wanted this to end. All good things must eventually end.

John's head squeezed under her, his nose nuzzling her neck, kissing in gentle nips. His arms holding her closely, squeezing in the comforting strength she had longed for so long.

"Carol... I can't... I'm going to... oh fuck..." He grunted as she felt his shaft grow in her hand, harder even than it had been, swelling, she felt the muscular contractions of his legs, felt the tendons of his neck tense against her cheek. He thrust rhythmically between her fingers, almost knocking her off the couch but squeezing so tightly, his arms vibrating, shaking. She felt the shots, the muscles of his stomach undulating with each shot, the wetness on her hand lubricating her strokes...

"oh, oh carol... ohh god... I... I.... Love you..." a slight grunt with each contraction. She knew he was staying quiet only with extreme will. He grunted each time her hand passed over the now dripping head of his cock, his body twitching.

The sensation was too much for him. He felt his balls pull tight against his body, felt the rising tension, the shower of tingles that coursed through his body and he knew it was over. He felt as if she had played his body like a virtuoso playing a violin, making it better than it had the potential to be on its own. He stopped holding back, letting it happen, taking him over the edge...

He twitched as her hand passed over the head, his body not under his control.

"Oh god Carol... Stop... it's too... it's too sensitive."

She held him gently and felt his body relax, the tension in his neck releasing, his legs, his stomach first, lastly, the tension in his cock drain as it slowly began to wilt in her hand.

"I love you John, that was... that was incredible!" she whispered to him.

"I think that's what I was supposed to say... Oh my god Carol... Where'd you learn to do that?"

"I've never done it like that John... before.... I mean..."

"You've never done that before? You've never... ummm been with a guy before?"

Carol laughed out loud.

"of course I've been with a guy before... I had a serious relationship for a while but it wasn't like that... I mean... he'd... you know... get his, and then roll over... stick it in and three minutes later it'd be over. He never touched me, I never touched him... like that I mean. I hated it, it was something I had to endure... I never thought about it with him, I never thought about it after we split up... until now. I mean, I actually thought about what it would be like with you. Even when I thought you hated me."

"I want you Carol, I want to make love with you..."

Carol giggled quietly. "I don't think now is really the best time John..." He smiled as she squeezed his spent member. "Honey, sleep... rest... I'll be right back..." She slid out from under the blanket and rose walking through the darkness, careful not to step on the mattresses in the living room.

When she returned he was on his back snoring softly. She leaned down with the warm wash cloth and gripped him. Smiling as she felt the beginnings of tumescence. She leaned over and kissed him softly, lingering on his lips as he slept.

"I love you too John."

Her bed seemed desolate after the warmth of John's arms. She tossed and couldn't get comfortable. Her body still vibrated as she concentrated on cementing the past hour in her memory. She was wet, she could feel it between her lips, sliding as she changed positions.

‘I don't believe I just did that.' She thought. ‘That poor boy, he's going to think I'm a huzzy. A brazen older woman that preys on young men. He was so hard, so responsive...' Her nipples were hard and tingling each time she moved and the soft silky chemise slipped across them. Her hand rubbed her nipple trying to stop the feeling and she was surprised at the sensation.

‘Is this the feeling everyone talks about?' She had never felt like this before, never been at a point where she had the desire burning in her stomach, and farther... down there. Her fingers slid under her panties, over the soft down, farther, over the bump of her clitoris. She felt her lips part, the wetness running down, over her ass. She knew she was getting the mattress wet but she couldn't help it. Her finger crossed over her clit again, beginning a circular pattern. She felt her hips begin to move, an instinctual humping. She wished John was there, She wished John's fingers were between her legs.

She wanted to feel his weight above her, feel that velvet smooth hardness separate her. It was the first time in her life that she actually wanted to be penetrated. The tingles rose and crescendos in blue sparks of sensation coursed through her body. It felt so good but she knew there was more. More than she could experience without... without him. Oh god what had happened to her?

John woke in the morning with a start. ‘Where is she? She never came back last night. Shit. I'm no better than who ever that asshole was. I "got mine" and then promptly rolled over and went to sleep. Fuck, I hope I can make it up to her... God I miss her.' The thought shocked him a bit.

He looked around the room and saw her in the kitchen, hair tucked behind one ear. She was stirring scrambled eggs on the stove, steam rising while Billy Todd and Bob sat at the table, empty plates in front of them, knife and fork in hand.

John walked into the kitchen, and took one of the glasses of orange juice, dinking it quickly.

"Morning."

"Morning Carol." He looked at her as she spooned the eggs into an oversized bowl and placed the pan in the sink in front of him. He was trying to figure out what she was thinking, was she upset with him? She had an expression he found hard to interpret.

She had no make up on, her silky hair flowed smoothly over her shoulders, one side tucked behind her ear. Her head was tilted slightly. She was the most beautiful woman he'd ever seen. He wanted to hold her, to hug her, to kiss her neck. It was a physical pain to keep from touching her.

He picked up the frying pan and a sponge and wordlessly started to scrape the remnants out of the pan. She turned, grabbing a plate of bacon from the counter and placed the eggs in front of the guys at the table.

"If you guys want more let me know..."

John felt her arms on his shoulders, sliding down his back and wrapping around his chest from behind. He tensed not expecting the tender embrace. Her chin came to rest on his shoulder. She kissed his ear, nuzzled his neck. It was one of the most intimate experiences he'd ever had.

"Carol, what are you doing?" John whispered, still tense.

"I can't help it John... I don't... care what they think..."

He put the pan down in the sink and turned slowly in her arms.

"Oh god baby... You're so beautiful..." He kissed her, their lips brushing, intimate but almost chaste. He looked over her shoulder at Bob as they hugged and saw him grinning. A sophomoric thumbs up, eye brows raised.

"Go take a shower, we've got to get rolling soon, it's almost 8 the day's wasting away." She kissed him again, the level of familiarity, the comfort, the natural feel to the kiss surprised him. She took the pan from him and turned to the sink as he walked into the living room, grabbing his bag and pulling clothes from it.

When he came out of the bathroom Bob was waiting for him.

"Don't say anything stupid Bob."

"John, what happened? How did this happen?"

"Bob, I don't know... it just happened..."

"You're serious about this? You know what you're going to deal with when we get back?"

"You mean with her being a professor?"

"Yeah, you're going to take a boat load of shit dude... She's going to get some pretty heavy duty shit too... I don't know how deep this'll get for her. I mean the professor shit..."

"You say that like it's a disease."

"She's from the dark side man! A professor! I mean, I always knew the girl that hooked you would be different, but a professor? I never would've guessed..."

"She's sweet Bob, when she looks at me my knees get weak."

"Yeah here, but when we get back and you're getting the shit will it be the same?"

"Bob, you know that shit doesn't matter to me. I've never felt like this before... I can't help it."

"Would you be willing to leave school? Will you be able to deal with it?"

"I don't need this, you know that. It's something I wanted to do, I don't have to."

"I know but it's an awful lot to throw away. She's really that important to you? Already?"

"This is serious Bob, it's like... Let me put it this way. You're pissing me off because I'm here with you instead of being with her. Know what I mean?"

"I'm jealous. She is gorgeous but, I'm jealous that no one has ever affected me that way. I adore Marge but not like that. Ok, if that's the way you feel, that's the way it is. I'm there for you, if you need me... I've got your back.

"Watch out for Becky though... She's not as stupid as she looks, she wants you right now and she'll go after Carol. When she finds out that you're not interested she'll go after you too."

"Fuck Becky."

"I know how you meant that... but you may want to be careful how you say that in the future."

John punched his closest friend affectionately in the arm.

"Thanks"

John carried her skis as they walked up the hill to the ski area. The group laughed and joked as they walked, Carol stayed close to John.

Carol and John sat close together on the lift in silence.

"I want to know everything about you." Carol looked at John. "I mean, your parents, are they going to be upset that you're seeing an older woman? Are you nervous about that?"

"I don't think they'll be a problem. Mom's gonna love you, my Dad, he'll like you too."

"What does your dad do?"

"He works..."

"He works... what does he do?"

"lots of different stuff."

"Like a handy man?"

"It's a little more involved than that. He makes tools. And he ships stuff."

Carol had a mental image of a small man bent over a tool making machine, she looked at John and knew he didn't want to talk about it anymore. She snuggled over to him and put her head on his shoulder.

"It doesn't matter ya know... I love you."

"I love you too Carol."

Carol noticed a distance in John that day while they skied. He never left her side, he laughed but he was occupied, seemed lost in thought.

John served a chicken dish, over rice, with a cheese sauce for dinner. Carol was doing the dishes while the others prepared to go out for the evening. John walked up behind her.

"Do you want to go out with the others?"

"I want to do what you want to do."

"Can we stay here? Just us?"

The others came in the kitchen, Marge the leader as always. "we're heading out, you guys coming?"

"Nah, we're going to stay here. I'm tired and Carol wanted to read her book. You know that professor shit."

Marge laughed, Bob chuckled.

"ok. If you change your mind we'll be at the same place as last night."

When the door closed behind them Carol put her arms around John's waist, leaning back effectively pressing her pelvis into his. She rocked back and forth smiling at John. He reached up and touched her cheek, looking at her intensely.

"You're beautiful Carol."

"John, do you love me?"

"I told you I love you."

"I mean do you really love me, enough to go through everything we're going to have to go through? Enough to introduce me to your folks, enough to deal with my parents? Do you love me the kind of love that lasts forever?"

"I do Carol."

"I want you. I've never said that to a man before. I've never really wanted a man before. I want you, I want you to make me feel like a woman."

John leaned forward and kissed Carol. It started as small kiss, just a peck but grew from there. Her lips opened, and she pressed against him, her full length, her pelvis, her thighs, her breasts. She felt him grow against her, lengthening, hardening. She felt the sparks as his cock touched her clit, rolled across it.

"Oh John... Love me... Make love to me..."

"Carol."

She pulled him by the hand up the stairs and into her bedroom, with the skinny single bed. He kissed her once again, his hand sliding around her back, kneading, holding her tight. He was determined that this experience would be the best she ever had.

His hand felt the weight of her breast, felt the nipple harden against his palm. His hand pulled her shirt up, felt the incredible softness of her skin. He found the clasp in front and deftly released the clasp. His hand slid under the cup, feeling the softness of her breast, capturing her nipple in his fingers, rolling it gently between finger and thumb.

"You're beautiful Carol." He leaned down to take her nipple into his mouth, his lips closing gently, his tongue worrying it back and forth. Carol had never felt the sensations she was feeling before. It seemed as if there was a direct line between her nipple and her clit. Each time his tongue passed over her nipple she felt more moisture between her legs, both of which were twitching.

His hand slid down, under the elastic waist of her pants, below her panties, through the hair there to find her clit. His finger dipped lower, separating her lips and was wet when he again touched her clit. He rubbed it back and forth, not touching it directly but moving the shaft back and forth. His fingers together he began pressing harder and moving in circles. Carol was amazed at the feelings she was feeling.

"Carol, I love you." John pressed his face into her neck, supporting her with a hand on her back, his knee between her legs. She wanted to spread her legs farther, she was losing control as the tingles grew, the heat spreading through her body, her thoughts concentrating on the sensation he was creating in her. She felt it start, and tried to hold it back briefly but lost control as his finger slid over her clit again and again, now concentrating on the exposed tip.

"Oh John, I'm... I'm going too..." She went up on her tip toes as if she was trying to get away, her body vibrating, her fingers clenched on his arm. He felt her pussy swell, the walls collapse and she fell against him. He held her tightly as she groaned in his ear.

"Oh god, oh god, oh god. Unh! Ohhh uhn..." a mix between groans and grunts, she became heavy in his arms. He lay her down gently on the bed and lay down beside her. Leaning over to kiss her he slid her shirt up over her head, again leaning down to suck her nipple, gently, tongue worrying.

He pulled her sweater over her head, marveling at the beauty that lay beneath him. He slowly slid down her body, leaving a trail of kisses behind him. He'd never felt the emotion that he felt now, the heart rending passion. He kissed her navel as his fingers fumbled to pull her pants down over her hips.

"John... what are you... what are you going to do?"

"I'm going to make love to you..."

He kissed her stomach, and lower, getting closer...

"John, don't... no... I've never... no one has ever..."

"Carol, I want to make love to you, I want to taste you, feel you... we can make love... or... there's so much more, love..."

She felt his tongue touch her lips and tensed as his tongue traced between them, separating them, sliding up between them. She felt a shower of sparks as it passed over her clit, her body reaching another level of tension, for another reason. Her hand reached down to his head, trying to push him away.

‘How could he want to... do that...' She thought. ‘It's got to be... I'm musky... wet... oh god that feels good..."

Her thoughts disintegrated as she felt his fingers inside her for the first time, one, then two, curling, hooking, rubbing... She felt a level of pleasure she'd never felt before, trying to spread her legs farther, now pulling his head towards her as she pressed herself to his mouth, and that tongue, that wonderful flicking tongue. The tingles of her clit were approaching a crescendo but under riding that was an internal shower, a pulsing of pleasure that kept growing from inside of her, that emanated through out her body. She didn't quite feel a source of pleasure, it was all encompassing, almost a physical mood. She tried to concentrate on it, to find its source. She almost cried when he pulled his fingers from her and the feeling started to fade, to be over shadowed by the familiar pleasure of her clit. She felt the spasms begin, building.

"oh John... No... no... please..."

"Do you want me to stop?" John looked up at her, her body taut, her nipples rising from the peaks of her breasts, long, thick... he reached up and touched one, rubbing it, teasing it...

"John... oh... inside... John please... don't stop... please..."

She once again pressed his head, pushing his face to her pussy, feeling his nose separate her lips. He once again slid his fingers inside of her and again she felt that glow rising through her body, a general feeling of pleasure, now focusing, becoming more intense. The intensity equal to the pleasure she felt from her clit as he captured it between his lips... The pleasure was overwhelming, too much, she vibrated from head to curling toe, her fingers laced in his hair, not realizing how hard she was pulling, her other hand found the sheets of the bed, grabbing, pulling, her knees flopped completely open and her hips rose from the bed.

John felt her go over the edge, felt the walls of her pussy implode, the rush of liquid as she had her first G spot orgasm. Her hips dropped and her body shook, once, twice. He slowed his rubbing, held her clit between his lips tongue not moving but pressed against it as he rode through her orgasm. Her clit added sharpness to her orgasm, her G spot adding body to the sensation. It was a whirl of color, of feeling, of sound, disjointed but distinct, a glow and a pinpoint all at once.

As she collected herself, breathing hard she realized that John was laying next to her, holding her in his arms, stroking her body gently. She hadn't felt him move, hadn't realized she was that lost in the sensation.

"What... what did you do to me? I've never... never felt anything..."

"I made you feel good?" She felt his cheek tense as he smiled in the dark and she lay helpless on her back. His arms around her were her lifeline, the connection that kept her from being frightened by the intensity of her recent experience.

"Oh god John... I want to make you feel that good. I want... I let... I let myself go... I lost control, I've never let myself lose control like that... ever..."

"I love you Carol." Tears ran down her cheeks, not from sadness, not from happiness but because of the depth of emotion she was feeling.

"Make love to me John... Be inside me..." It took a moment for Carol to understand as John stood up. He removed his clothes quickly.

‘He's doing that like a practiced art...' Carol tried to shrug off the momentary concern. John pulled a condom onto his hard cock and laid down next to Carol, his arms went around her as he rolled on top of her, taking his weight on his elbows, his hands under her pulling her up to him in an embrace more intimate than she had ever felt. She was being drawn to him as he slid into her, she grunted with the spark of pleasure as the head slid inside, resting, allowing her the moment she needed to adjust to his girth. She had a mental image of that velvety smoothness as it slid into her, gentle short thrusts, each a little deeper until his pelvis met hers, his hair tickling her clit.

The sensation was different than anything she had felt before. She could feel his heart beat, she could feel the blood coursing through his body, she could feel the tightening of his chest as his heart swelled with emotion. She knew she was truly making love for the first time in her life and she wanted to make it good for him, she squeezed him as he slid smoothly into her. The rhythm becoming natural, she tried to spread her legs farther, tried to get him deeper into her. She wrapped her legs around him, tilting her pelvis to open herself to him more completely, her hips meeting him, feeling she was giving herself to this man, ultimately, without reservation, without inhibition.

At that moment she knew she would do anything it takes to be with him forever. She would support him, give him her heart, her emotions, her future. She would have his children, she would share in his life, she would do anything to be by his side.

John was trying to stave off his crescendo, giving his heart to this woman. He loved her like he had never loved before. This was different than anything that had ever happened to him before. He felt her squeeze him and knew he couldn't prolong it anymore. It was with sadness, knowing that this was coming to an end, that this connection, this physical connection that embodied his emotion would end with a flash of pleasure like that he'd never felt before.

His body tensed and he thrust deeply into her, holding still, each twitch as his cock fired another shot adding a new level to her orgasm. His head down, his lips on her neck he twitched through his orgasm, feeling hers as he began to collect his thoughts.

"I love you Carol."

"Oh John, I love you... I won't hide it... I don't care... I can't hide it."

"It's ok Carol... it's going to be ok." She felt his hand on her cheek, softly touching her, as if memorizing her face by touch. "It'll all be ok my love..."

He held her closely. Listening to the pattern, the rhythm of her breathing settle, becoming slower, longer, deeper. He found that his breathing had fallen into sync, slower, regular... content.

Thanks for reading. Please, if you got this far you either enjoyed it or really hated. Either way, let me know what you liked and what you didn't.

JJ